Shadowfire
by TheChaosSniper
Summary: This the story of my OC Shadowfire. She was just a normal femme until she was captured by the Decepticons. What will she do when she onlines with no memorys of her past, and will she ever see her family again?
1. Chapter 1

Right so this is my first story I've written so while comments and constructive criticism is welcome. There is no need to ramble about what you don't like if you don't give ways to fix that. Anyway enjoy the story and if you have ideas feel free to share them.

p.s.

Keep in mind at this time I have no beta reader

p.s.s

Keep in mind the story is M for a reason as of now just violence later who knows?

Disclaimer: I own only my OC Shadowfire and changes to existing plot.

Chapter 1

Breem- 8.3 minutes

Nano-klick- One second

Klick- 1.2 minutes

Joor-6.5 hours

Solar cycle-One day

Cycle-1.25 hours

.:abcd:.- Comm' link

{abcd}- Bond

Mornings they can fall into several categories ok, good, bad, amazing, or horrible. Today thankfully falls onto the fourth why you ask? Today is my last solar cycle of being considered a youngling. As of tomorrow I'll officially be a fully grown femme. No more little femme(Its ridiculous as is being I'm about 26 feet tall for Primus sake) or femmeling just femme. As I lay there optics offline just enjoying the moment happy and content reality decided to reaffirm itself like a vicious slap to the face.

"Shadowfire you have 5 klicks to get your aft down here before I grab you by your peds and drag you down myself!"... Isn't my mother so caring. As illogical as a 16 foot femme dragging me off of my berth seems I know she would find a way.

"You can't grab what you can't see!" I yell back. Problem solved now I can get a few extra klick... "I can if I flash bomb your room first!"...Slag. I go over many scenarios but in all of them I end up blind and deaf. The fragging glitch would be laughing her aft off the whole time too.

"That's what I thought." she yells. I vent sharply but get up and then proceed to check my armor for any large scuffs or loose plates.

Exactly 5 klicks later I'm down stairs getting my energon when she walks in with my brother. I forgo words and just fix her with a harsh glare.

"Don't give me that you got plenty of recharge." she states completely ignoring it.

"Was another breem really too much to ask for?" I say with just a hint of a whine.

"For femme a solar cycle from being a fully grown you act like such a sparkling." If I wasn't so observant I would have missed when her optics slightly dulled for less than a nano-klick.

With a slow vent I tell her "If you wanted to spend more time with me this morning all you had to do was say so."

Now she vents "Maybe I just wanted make sure you weren't late?"

I know she won't admit it but I know she's sad her little femme is all grown up. "Where's dad?" I ask changing the subject to humor her.

"He said he needed to finish a project but he'll be here before you leave." she said siting at the table to feed my sibling his energon. He could drink it himself but I think she's milking the last orns of his sparklinghood for all it's worth.

As if they planned it my father walks in at that moment with a long slender bundle in his hands. I am of course instantly curious "What's that?" I ask before he can even say good morning. "What's what?" he says with a gleam to his optic that tells me he knows damn well what.

So I vent sharply and look at him expectantly. "Oh this it's nothing just an extra project I did in my spare time." he say so nonchalantly I know he's up to something. "Daaddd..." He just chuckles and hands it to me.

"Tell me what you think of it." I unfold the cloth and am left staring at a beautiful energon blade not unlike my own. The only differences are that it's just a bit longer with a tad more mass. There were also dark purple flames on each side.

My gaze shot to his face and he laughed "Yes it's for you now I know I taught you how to properly inspect a blade." I took this as my cue to check its balance (perfect of course), edge, and then activating and deactivating the energon in the blade, reveling in the fact that the flames lite up to the same violet purple color of my optics. I also formed my now old blade on my back and compared the two. Sheathing my new blade on my back in the gap between my wing and back plates I immediately bent over a little to hug my father (still not sure where the pit I get my height from) and thank him profusely. I hear my mother laughing behind me I turn to see her grinning knowingly.

"Oh mute it primus knows I inherited my love of weapons from both you." I say however this just makes her smile bigger than before. I spend the next cycle testing my new blade learning what it can do. I'm not sure how he managed it but now that it(somehow) recognizer's me as its sole owner (till I offline apparently), I can now form it into two separate blades or connect them into one double sided blade (With practice). Needless to say I love it. Now after our cycle long test/sparing session it's time for me and my brother to leave.

"Bye mom bye dad!" I say and turn with my bro to leave only to be waylaid by my mom, who has decide to forgo her pride to give me one last hug. " Aww I knew you cared." I say with no small amount of amusement showing in my optics and voice. Her response comes in the form of the high pitched whine of her rifle charging." I love you to." I say laughing and walk out the door. "So bro when are you going start feeding yourself?" I ask smiling.

He playfully glares back "I could now and you know it but mom's to stubborn to let me, she even did it when Sunny and Sides were over, the fraggers laughed for joors!" I look at him not really surprised at his language. "I'm going to assume mom doesn't know you learned that word from dad." I state dryly. I know this to be fact as there is an obvious lack of dents and scorch marks on his armor.

He just grins and we duck across the street when there are no vehicles in sight. A breem later we arrive at our destination the youth care/ school area of the youth sector. "Hey 'Fire ,Bee long time no see." Sideswipe says appearing suddenly from our left. I immediately take note of the mischievous glimmer in his optics. I vent and ask " Who is it this time and no I won't hide you?" with a semi-amused yet resigned voice.

"What makes you think I did something?" he asked with faked innocence, while at the same time checking the surrounding area for somebody or something. I just point to the pink and black specks of paint on his servos. "Maybe I was just feeling artistic." he defends. I just roll my optics "Sunny's the painter you only use it in class or pranks" Bee points out "and as class hasn't started..."

"Fine I did! Please hide me!"

He pleads with us but we only grin. I then note the lack of a certain yellow narcissist. It still amazes me he cares so much about his paint at such a young age. "It's Sunny isn't it?" I ask. He nods "then you're fragged and can't he just find you through your bond anyway?"

This fact was obviously over looked as he pales then ducks as a black and pink blur flew over his head, making me and Bee jump back to avoid being caught between them. This allows us to get a good look at the now zebra like bot, if zebras were an obnoxious shade of pink with black stripes (or maybe black with pink stripes). I feel my parent's curiosity through our bond, I send them an image while I try not to fall over laughing.

Now I feel their amusement fill the bond which proves to be too much as now I am on the ground laughing. "Come back here Sideswipe!" Sunstreaker yells and takes off after his soon to be scrap twin. Bee follows leaving me to looking like a complete glitch trying to get off the ground and control myself.

Before this can happen I find myself looking at the black ped of my parents overly logical and rule happy friend. "Dare I ask?" he inquires. I manage to gasp out "Twins." He vents and by this time I'm able to point in the right direction and so he thanks me and walks off.

A couple klicks later I was able to pick myself up and head to my sparing class still giggling occasionally along the way. As we are at war sparing and weapons classes have been added for the older bots, as most will be joining the Autobots army and heading to boot camp as soon as they are officially fully grown bots.

Because of my parents insistence that I train with them as well I have an advantage and am more that proficient with all my weapons. This includes my two energon daggers, new sword, both plasma cannons, and my plasma rifle with and without scope. It also helps that I can cloak myself though I haven't quite mastered that yet.

Meaning I can become cloaked from the visible spectrum but can't completely hide my heat and energy signature's. It was half way through the solar cycle when we heard the first explosion. I heard the city alarms going off and searched for my parents and brother though our bonds. They were fine and as my parents are part of the garrison of the city they were able to tell us it was just a Decepticon raid of a storage depot outside the city.

Then closing off the bond to where we could barely feel them so they could focus on the battle. I immediately took off to find Bee changing my arm back as I left the range. A breem later I was walking with him to the bunkers when a powerful blast sent me careening head first into the wall. Through the dizziness and pain I hear another alarm going off but it wasn't for the city nope, the 'Cons were attacking the youth sector.

As she dodged explosions dashing from cover to cover the dark blue femme reveled in the feeling of battle. She could feel her mate through their bond as they darted across the battlefield blasting at 'Cons as they defended the storage depot. They continued in this pattern dodge, fire, move repeat until she felt a surge of pain and fear from the bonds with her sparklings followed by a large explosion from behind her. As she turned her spark sunk at the thick black smoke billowing from the area of the city the youth sector resides in. Even as she listened she could hear smaller blasts going off.

.:Optimus!:. She commed even as her mate turned to look.

.:Go take Arcee and Flare-up we'll come when we can!:. So she transformed and speed toward the city as they and her mate did the same.

As they got closer they could hear plasma fire and grenades going off and the volume only increased as they drew nearer. The moment they were in range she transformed and opened fire with the fury and deperation of a mother protecting her offspring. The 'Cons apperantly didn't expect there to be any retaliation yet and so were unprepared for their counter-attack much less the accuracy and fury behind it. The femme and her comrades finally made it to the entrance of the structure.

.:Optimus we've reached the sector's entrance it is now clear and we are moving inside:. Arcee commed.

.:Acknowledged the battle is still going strong out here we will join you when we can,:. Optimus replied both knowing it could be breems till that was possible. .:and Arcee please tell them to be careful:.

.:Optimus...:. She started

.:I know but try not to take to many risks Prime out:. With that the comm ended and they moved inside hopping they weren't too late.

I had forgone letting Bee walk and was now carrying him as it was infinitely faster. Through our bond I could feel our parents were close and if anyone could get us it was them. Just as I was starting to feel hope we rounded the corner to see three large seekers and six drones. Of course it was too much to ask that we not be seen. I know our parents felt my sure of fear over the bond followed by Bee's. Before they could move or spot hopefully spot Bee I sprinted back around the corner into an open room and shoved Bee into the vent in the ceiling.

{Bee I know your scared but you need to stay here and be completely silent ok?} I quickly tell him. {But...} {No! Stay here and don't make a sound!} I hiss sharply hoping to shock him into silence. Without waiting for an answer I activate my cloak and bolt out of the room and into the one across. Deactivating the cloak and forming my left servo into my cannon {Love you Bee} sending loving feelings through close it off, wait till they can see me then sprint down the hall away from my brother firing all the way.

I managed to get down the hall and around the corner before I realized it was a dead end. As I turn they appear at the end of the hall and start to approach me slowly. I transform my servo again while also forming my blade on my back. When they are close enough I throw both my daggers killing one mech and wounding another in the leg. As they are airborne I grab my blade then swing watching the glowing purple fire as I take off the head of the injured 'Con with ease.

Turning I strike at the next as he blocks I slice at my next target dodging, weaving and attacking all the while. I continue this till I take a bad hit to my left arm, I cry out as it cuts down to the strut before I spin away energon spraying the walls. I felt my mom starting to panic slightly, I know I should close the bond but I can't knowing there is no way for me to survive this. I cut down the 'Con before he can react leaving me facing off with the three seekers.

The leader spoke lowly to the black and purple jet next to him and is his voice slightly screechy even at that volume. "Alive!" exclaimed the black jet obviously surprised at his leader. "Yes 'Warp alive will that be an issue?" As they continued to talk as if I wasn't there I put away my sword and formed both servos into cannons.

I have no desire to let them anywhere near me if I'm wanted alive Primus knows what for. I fire hitting the mister screechy in the left knee but missing the black jet with the second. But as I dove into the open door on my right I was hit by a beam from the leaders weapon right above my spark chamber.

My entire chassis went numb, not to say it didn't hurt like pit 'cus it did. I looked up when a shadow appeared above me to see mister screechy (may as well get in a few laughs before I offline) looking down at me. I reached out to my mom and dad thru our bond one last time as my vision started to fade, felling panic and fear from them {I love you, I'm sorry!}I said while I sent regret and love to them. {Shadowfire!} I hear mother cry. I can almost hear her yelling now...

The last thing I felt was a sudden pain from whatever was attached to my chassis directly over my spark then nothing.

Arcee was sprinting down the hallway trying to keep up with the two desperate parents as she ran around a corner she saw them enter a room. A couple nano-klicks later they came out the mother holding a yellow and black sparkling she recognized as Bee. "Where's your sister?" his mother asked barely able to keep it together. Her and her mate's heads shot up before they started to sprint down the hall "Shadowfire!" Her mother yelled, only to have a large explosion throw them back down the hall.

The sudden pain that stabbed through Arcee's spark less than a nano-klick after kept her on the floor. When it faded a klick later leaving an empty feeling, she checked her plating for any shrapnel. Confused when they were intact till she saw Bee and his parents clutching at their sparks like a piece had been savagely ripped out, and in a way that was technically true. All she could hear was the mother mumbling "no no no!" over... and over... and over...

As Elita-1 stood outside of the door of her friend with two cubes of energon she debated over whether or not to go in. She knew that she needed to talk to someone, and as she had secluded herself from her sparkmate and sisters leaving her the only one left to try. When Elita walked into the room she wasn't surprised at the low light she expected it.

No what surprised her was the once proud femme curled up on the floor next to her berth her optics and armor dull, holding and caressing her sparkling(Technically youngling now) as if it was the last thing in the universe. "Chromia?" She said softly not sure exactly how to approach the distraught femme.

"Chromia you need to put him down for a bit." She try's a second time.

"Why?" a hoarse sounding voice said quietly the pain so easy to hear.

"Because he will go into stasis lock if he doesn't get energon now." Chromia starts a bit at this but slowly stops her caresses and lets him go. Elita took this as a sign to move him away and was surprised when a servo griped her arm.

"No, please at least keep him where I can see him." she begged. Elita slowly nodded her head "Of course." she said softly as a pang went through her spark at how much her friend had changed.

She set Bee down next to his cube of energon which he immediately snatched up and started to gulp down. She held out the other cube to Chromia. She didn't take it at first just stared at it blankly.

"Chromia please you need to drink it." Elita stated firmly enough to make it clear the word no was not an option. She took it albeit slowly but made no move to drink. "Chromia..."

"Why?" She said her tone flat emotionless.

Elita started surprised to get an answer. "Because you need..."

"No why is she gone?" Chromia interrupted in the same flat tone. Elita slowly vented now knowing what she meant.

"I don't know 'Mia." she said her voice low and subdued "I guess it was just her time."

"But why now? Why not in thousands of vorns surrounded by family, by her sparklings?" Chromia said her voice growing more emotional as she went on "My little femme, she was so happy, joking, teasing, it was her last day in classes! Why is She Offline!" she was in tears at this point tightly clenching the cube of energon in her servo.

She was past depression at this point and had moved to anger "She was supposed to be safe in the youth sectors, they were in the middle of the fragging city! How did the Decepticons get by without even tripping a single fragging alarm!"

Elita had picked up Bee and backed up a bit when Chromia rose rifle whining and optics blazing a brilliant raging blue half way through her rant, despite her low energon levels.

She slowly stopped and then sat heavily in the corner next to the energon cube, tears in her optics. When she deemed it safe Elita set Bee back down and walked over to her friend. She put her arms around her and just held as she sobbed. A couple of cycles later Elita left the room slowly venting now glad that she had brought high grade for her friend, as it most defiantly helped even if she was now slightly over charged. She turned to the mech waiting on the floor next to the door.

"You should go in now they're both going to need you." Ironhide just nodded and entered the room closing the door behind him. Venting again and rubbing her face, Elita walked off to find her mate. As well as get some high grade of her own.


	2. Chapter 2

Breem- 8.3 minutes

Nano-klick- One second

Vorn- 83 years

Klick- 1.2 minutes

Joor-6.5 hours

Solar cycle-One day

Cycle-1.25 hours

.:abcd:.- Comm' link

{abcd}- Bond

Disclaimer: I own only my OC and plot changes.

AN: Anonymous reviews are now allowed. Sorry it wasn't fixed sooner.

Chapter 2

Youth sectors 'Con POV

Starscream followed his squad through the halls keeping track of the comm's and issuing order's when need be. He mainly just watched for issues and occasionally firing off shots at the fleeing younglings and caretakers. They finished off the last sparklings in the rooms, their caretaker begging for them to be spared till one 'Con stabbed them thru the spark silencing her plea's.

.:All squads status update now.:. Starscream demanded

He was pleased to find that almost all had completed their tasks, and that the others would be finished very soon. At least until he noticed the squad assigned to the entrance of his building had not checked in.

.:Hellraiser what is your status?:. No answer

.:If you are fooling around ag...:. Starscream started to growl only to find he was speaking to himself, the comm unable to connect. The only reasons for this was they were 1. offline or 2. they were being jammed, both meant the same thing.

"We leave now!" The seeker commanded "Its seems the Autoscum have finally arrived, and I for one have no desire to be trapped in this building."

There were mumbles of agreement from behind him as they started down the hall. Only to see a black bot dart around the corner, they barely had time to register the slight widening of their optics before the bot was gone. Before Starscream could say a thing the six privates behind him sprinted forward.

"No you glitch heads!" he yelled but they ignored him.

"Slagging grounders!" The commander growled out before starting after them motioning his two trine mates to follow. _At least we're heading toward our exit_ he though, as they turned the corner to see the six 'Cons and their quarry halfway down the hallway. When the seekers rounded the next corner Starscream spotted the black bot about 50 meters down the hall.

As the bot-no the femme he realized whirled around having discovered too late that it was a dead end. He watched as instead of cowering on the floor and begging for her life as the others had, she crouched slightly flexing both servos. This went unnoticed by the six slowly advancing 'Cons, who saw only an unusually tall yet defenseless femme.

Starscream stopped his trine mates with one hand wanting to see how the situation played out. At best he gained a possible new recruit (with some adjustments made by Soundwave) and a show, at worst he didn't have to dirty his claws to offline one femme.

Then she made her move throwing two daggers through the air and drawing a sword before they even hit. The 'Con not killed by the dagger was immediately relived of his head, the one next to him barely blocking in time to avoid a similar fate.

The next 30 nano-klicks were filled with the clashing of blade against blade as she fought for her life evading some blows, and not seeming to notice those that landed. The next 'Con was dispatched with a single thrust through the spark. Another following just nano-klicks later cleaved almost in two.

The next lost an arm and spun away causing the femme miss her next strike. After quickly offlining them she started to turn only to receive a deep gash to the upper part of her left arm. However she recovered quickly and cut down the final bot.

Deciding she would do very well for his purpose's, Starscream whispered to Skywarp "When I tell you to I want you to warp her out I need her alive." "Alive!" Skywarp exclaimed surprised. Rolling his optics he answered "Yes 'Warp alive will that be an issue?" Screamer asked looking at him. "No but why?" came his reply.

Before he could answer Starscream heard the whine of charging canons. As he turned back to them femme two blasts of plasma were headed in their direction. He reflexively fired his null rays a nano-klick before one connected with his left knee. "Fragging femme!" He yelled/growled and then checked the damage.

As it was not in need of immediate repair he ignored it and limped down the hall to the now semi-offline femme. Noting offhand the damage to her right wing. "Thundercracker place the charge in the doorway, 'Warp get ready to warp us out." Starscream ordered while picking up the femme and attaching a device above her spark chamber.

"On my mark you blow the bomb while you warp us out." he ordered pointing to Thundercracker and Skywarp respectively. As they grouped together in the room Starscream heard a femme yell "Shadowfire!" from out of sight. "Now." he said as he activated the device then they were gone.

Kaon

As Starscream stood next to Megatron if he was unsure whether he would be punished or praised. "So tell me Starscream is there a legitimate reason why you captured this femme, or are simply that desperate for an interface?" Megatrons asked barely sounding interested. Holding back the vent he so badly wanted to let out Starscream answered "Of course Lord Megatron I wouldn't dare waste our precious resources on something so... trivial."

"Then please enlighten me Starscream as to why this femme is so important." Megatron said beginning to sound impatient. "Then if you would please watch this clip Lord Megatron and I will answer your questions after?" The seeker requested.

Megatron paused it on the frame where Starscream was attaching his device to the femmes chestplates. "And what exactly is that?" Megatron asked not giving away if he was at all impressed. "Hm I will get to that next, as to why the femme is so important I took the liberty of having Soundwave hack into the Youth Sectors records."

"He found that she is top of her class in weapons training along with some very useful ability's, but what I found quite interesting is who her creators are." Starscream stated knowing he now had Megatrons full attention.

"And who might they be?"

"The femme's creators are the Autobot warriors Ironhide and Chrom.. Ugk" Before the seeker could even finish his sentence he found himself press against a wall by his throat.

"You impudent glitch!" Megatron roared "You brought the offspring of those pit-spawns to my base!"

"Lord Megatron if you would let me explain!" he begged hoping to be let down before he started to overheat as his air intakes were currently blocked.

"Well go on then explain, or you will be the first to engage them when they arrive!" Megatron growled out dropping the seeker.

Starscream started to pick himself up off the floor and was meet with the sight of a charging fission cannon.

"Of course my lord, the afore mentioned device is the reason they will not be arriving at all if Soundwave does him job right."

"What the device does upon activation is siphon energy from the spark of the bot it is attached to, that is immensely painful and would be the equivalent of say… the breaking of a bond between a creator and their creation." Starscream started to boast.

"This would be felt by said creators as well as any other relatives, the device then blocks off all energy from the spark isolating it inside their frame and blocking all bonds."

"And making it seem as though the bot is offline." finished Megatron seeming impressed "Congratulations you've actually managed to use your processor for once."

"Thank you Lord Megatron." Starscream said neglecting to mention his budding plans to over throw his glorious leader.

"Now tell me what is it that Soundwave is doing now?" Megatron asked looking through the window down into the medbay.

"If he does as I ordered he should be suppressing her memory's as well as blocking off all of her bonds in a way that it will seem to both party's that the other is offline." Starscream said glancing at said telepath who was just finishing his task.

"Good if it is successful I want you to assign Barricade as her partner, they are about the same age I believe," Megatron commanded

"I have need of a special team and their skills are perfect for it, if they manage to survive their training." he continued turning to leave.

"As you command Lord Megatron. "Starscream said to the back of the Decepticon leader, while opening a comm line to the new recruit .:Barricade I have a new task for you...

Barricade was excited to be assigned a partner already. Much less one that was his age. The only possible downside was that they were a femme, and only then because he had heard there wasn't many in the Decepticon ranks that weren't absolute glitch's.

The fact that she was apperantly hit by an emp blast damaging her memory core didn't exactly help matters. He hoped they could get along enough to work well together. Barricade decided to give her a chance, though he did hope he wouldn't have to reteach her everything. His bored musings were interrupted by a groan from the femme indicating she was coming online.

(Shadowfire POV)

I would love to say that onlining was pleasant but the sharp pain and emptiness filling my spark, coupled with my throbbing arm, wing, and processor ended that possibility. With a groan I raised an optic cover to survey my surroundings. Going by the sanitary smell and the beeping of machines I am assuming I'm in a medbay but where and why. Trying to remember only causes more pain from my processor causing me to groan again and close my optic cover.

"Are you online now?" asked a voice that definitely belonged to a mech.

My optic cover snapped open as I jerked up to look for the source. Only to be immediately pushed back down by a mech to my right. "No you stay down till after I'm done checking you, I don't want to waste time fixing your arm again just to satisfy your curiosity." he said in a gruff voice.

Confused I just lay there until he asked "Right now what's the last thing you remember?"

It was now that I realized I had no memory's, I knew how to speak and such but no recollection of learning how, I just knew.

"N-Nothing." I stuttered saddened and even more confused by this revelation.

The medic (at least that's my assumption) vents "Do you at least remember your designation?" he asks slightly annoyed whether at me or the situation I don't know. Thankfully I do remember it but not who gave it to me.

"It's Shadowfire." I say finally spotting the other mech in the room. He is black and white with a strong looking chassis and crimson optics. Come to think of it they both have red optics but if there is any meaning it's lost on me.

"Right well your injuries are healing well but no flying for at least a solar cycle." Flying? What is he talking about I thought. My confusion obviously showed because he just vented and turned to the other mech.

"If you could take yourself and your friend and leave my medbay before I give you a reason to stay." He says still annoyed by something.

"Yes sir!" the black and white mech replies and practically dragged me from the medbay after him. After he took me to my assigned room he stayed and talked. Well I asked questions and he answered them. I found out his name was Barricade and that I had been orphaned in a Autobot raid. The Autobots (blue optics) apperantly killed my parents and that is why it feels like a piece of my spark is missing, then I was later found injured by the Decepticons (red optics) and brought back to Hook (their medic) who apperantly saved my life. Maybe that's why he was annoyed, because he saved my life and I didn't even thank him.

"So do you think you'll stay." Barricade asked me breaking thru my thoughts.

"It's not like I have anywhere else to go, besides I owe them my life but what will I do?" I ask curious.

"Well Starscream said if you stayed then you would be my partner I hope that's ok." Barricade said looking slightly apprehensive.

I realized that he must think I won't like him, and while I'll admit I don't know much about him he seems alright.

"I think I would like that and I look forward to working with you." I say meaning every word.

His optics light up at this "Cool, well we start training tomorrow so I'll meet you here and we can go together so you don't get lost." He says getting up. Before he leaves though he asked one more question.

"Um Shadowfire?"

"Yes Barricade?"

"Do you umm... maybe want to uh... be... friends?" he ask apprehension in his voice.

I looked at him weighing my options. "You know it would be nice to have somebody talk to during my free time. So yes." I said with a small smile.

"Cool! I'll see you tomorrow then." and then left. Leaving me to muse about what exactly I was getting myself into.

I online to an incoming comm from Barricade which I accepted stretching out my cables .:Yes?:.

.:Come on I'm here and we need to get to the training grounds.:. He said

.:Alright I'll be right out.:. Ending the comm grabbing a cube of energon from the small supply in my room, down it then walk out the door. "Good morning Barricade." I say and as he replies we head off to the training course. It started off easy with an obstacle course that all completed, followed by endurance running then sparring.

I quickly found out this happened to be one of the skills I retained. But Barricade was no push over either so while he won in the end, I was more than happy with the performance I gave. Though there were times I was operating purely on instinct.

After training we talked while drinking our energon and I learned he had an older brother who he was separated from during the battle in which his parents were killed by a stray bomb. Barricade had onlined being treated by a 'Con medic and decided to follow him back to base.

I'm glad I had Barricade to talk to because, he took my mind off of the pain in my spark which seemed to constantly be dragging me down. After an orn of further training it was decided we were ready for weapons. While some like me and Barricade had many different powerful weapons, the rest only had a dagger and a small plasma pistol at most if even that and were taken to the armory.

Those of us left were handed practice blades and tested. I proved more than proficient with them and so was paired off with an instructor to spare with.

"You may have done well to start, but you are by no means an expert. I can teach you but if you don't practice it means nothing." They said "Got it?"

"Yes sir." I replied and then we began. It immediately became apparent that while I had more than a little skill there was much I had forgotten. I was on the defensive most of the time and any strikes I made were parried. When at the end of the lesson I finally landed a blow I was more than a little happy. Granted I lost but I had still improved, taking less hits than when we began.

A stellar cycle later I had passed the instructor and now just sparred with drones to keep my skills sharp. Me and 'Cade were now great friends and practiced fighting together. It was around this time that I started to get training as a sniper. My cloaking ability proved itself invaluable in this area, letting me easily complete all the course's. It helped that I practiced by constantly scaring the slag out of Barricade.

It was an orn later that we started to officially start training with our teams, or in my case Barricade. This went on for a while and then we started doing team vs. team matches. 'Cade and I usually won ours and those we lost we learned from. We never made the same mistake twice.

It may have continued this way if one match the other team hadn't decided to disregard the rules. Namely the fraggers decided to turn it into a live fire exercise.

"Only rule today is no flying otherwise fair game." The gray mech said as he handed out the laser rifles.

They're only used for training as the worst they can do is scorch your paint and knock you back a bit.

"Alright Sureshot, Rapidfire, Icerunner, Fireflight, and Quicksilver follow me to your starting zone." Starscream ordered.

Now I found it a bit odd that the sic (second in command) was leading them to their zone but maybe it was a punishment or he lost a bet? Either way it's weird that and he seems strangely excited about something as well.

"Barricade and Shadowfire lets go." Blackout ordered. I moved from where I had been petting Scorpionok and walked off after Blackout. Not quite sure when I stared liking Scorpy (yes I gave him a nickname) but now I do and we get along great. Plus his chirps are so cute, I've heard them compared to a sparklings so maybe it's just triggers some femme coding. Either way he's adorable.

As we arrived at our zone Blackout turned to us "The objective is to capture or kill the enemy's VIP, just do whatever's easier." he said then walked off Scorpionok followed after a goodbye chirp.

"Huh, that was the quickest, most uncaring briefing ever." 'Cade said slightly shocked.

"Yup." Was my reply, then we stood around for 5 klicks waiting for the signal to start.

.:Begin:. Said Starscream's voice over my comm. I activated my cloak and started forward scouting ahead while 'Cade followed silently a few meters behind me. A klick later I uncloaked when we stopped to find our location. As I walked toward Barricade I heard a very familiar whine. "Down!" I yelled tackling 'Cade to the ground as the area I had been standing was obliterated by plasma. We sprinted to the nearest wall with 'Cade slightly ahead of me.

He dove behind the wall safe. But right as I dove my left leg was hit sending me off course just a tad, it also made me roll until my back was parallel to the ground. Unfortunately this was enough to cause my right wing to clip the wall. After barely holding back a scream at the extreme pain, I just lay there for a moment.

"Fraaagg that hurts!" I groan managing to sit up.

Amazingly enough I had still made it behind the wall and was safe from the plasma currently flying around us. "So got a plan?" 'Cade asks huddling against the wall next to me.

"Yup, hunt down every single one of the fraggers and kill them." I say venom laced into my voice.

"Fine by me but how do we get out of this mess?" He asks.

I just stare at him then grab his servo and activate my cloak.

"Oh."

Oh. Really? That's his only comment? I vent then lead us away straight behind the wall. Then I start to flank around till I see Rapidfire and Icerunner 20 meters to our 12' still firing away.

.:You keep 'Runner silent while I take care of Rapidfire.:. I tell 'Cade and get a squeeze of my hand before he move's off. A klick later I receive a ping from him letting me know he is in position.

.:Now.:. I say then quickly move on Rapidfire forming a dagger. As the hilt finds my servo I grab his helm and yank it back, quickly cutting though his vocal processor and the main energon cables in his neck. Leaving him to his slow offlining I turn to 'Cade and see him holding a wide opticed Icerunner.

"You can either tell me where your fragging VIP is or I'll rip off your rod." I said still extremely piss. He went with the first option so I let 'Cade finish him with a single shot to the helm.

"Ready?" I asked wiping off my dagger.

Grinning he answered "Let's hunt."

About 10 klicks later we found the VIP (Sureshot) and both his teammates hiding in the treeline, finally having stopped firing.

Still cloaked I formed my rifle and crouched .:You want 'Flight or 'Silver?:. I asked

.:I'll take Fireflight no need to give 'Silver a chance to run.:. 'Cade reply's

Seeing his point I agree, Quicksilver has his name for a reason. As Barricade stealthily approaches 'Flight I set my sight over 'Silvers spark.

I count down .:3...2...1...:.

I fired and watched the blue plasma hit directly on target destroying his side, then moved to see Barricade hit Fireflight with multiple plasma blasts then finish her with his flail. Sureshot took off without a second look.

"Oh no he's running what ever shall we do." I deadpanned.

'Cade just smirks and then follows the very clear path left behind by the fleeing Sureshot. For a whole cycle we played with him, lulling him into false sense of security, only to flush him out with well-placed plasma shots. When we finally got bored I set up my rifle and had 'Cade flush him out again. However this time I lead him then fired watching as it blew off his left knee.

"Would you like to do the honors?" I ask 'Cade as we walked toward the now crawling Sureshot.

His answer came as a single round to Sureshot's helm.

"So that's a yes then."

Barricade just rolls his optics.

"Cute."

'Cade and I spun around to see Starscream standing behind us.

"Your wanted in the throne room." He says then walks off. Barricade and I shared a look before following.

When we arrived in the throne room Megatron was already waiting. Both me and 'Cade bowed to him.

"Lord Megatron." we said

"I assume you know why you have been summoned." He stated

"Yes M'lord."

"Good because of your actions today I have decided that you are ready to receive your brands."

I was stunned I thought we would be beaten, or at least punished somehow but certainly not this.

"Thank you M'lord." Both 'Cade and I said. I could hear in his voice he was just as surprised.

"In two solar cycles I have a mission for you until then go receive your brands from Hook and then rest understood?"

"Yes lord Megatron."

"Good, Dismissed."

We quickly left the room we walked in silence for a klick.

"Well I didn't see that coming." Barricade said

"Understatement of the vorn 'Cade, that wasn't even on my list of possibility's." I replied

We walked into the medbay then and spotted Hook.

"Hey Hook." I said sitting on an empty berth trying to move my right wing.

"Are you two actually here for a reason or just to bother me?" His gruff voice answered.

"We were told to report here to receive our brands." 'Cade stated

"Oh don't get to do that everyday, well come here then." At this point I was trying to figure out why I couldn't move my right wing or feel it for that matter.

Barricade got his on the left side of his chestplate then Hook motioned me over.

"Could you check my right wing after you're done?" I ask

Instead of answering he just pressed the brand to my shoulder.

"Ow." I deadpanned after he finished. He huffed then moved around to check my wing.

"What the pit did you do to it?" He asked

"Ran into a wall while diving for cover." I answered "Why is it that bad?"

"You can't feel it?"

"No." I said

"Well it seems to be fine so I'll just reset-" He said

As soon as he did so I was blindsided by an immense pain. My optics flickered and a gasp sounded from my vocal processor.

"I'm assuming the sensors work now." Hook said

I would have glared at him but I still couldn't bring myself to online my optics much less unshutter them.

"Oowww." I whined hoping this wouldn't last too long.

I heard a loud click followed by another spike of pain before it dulled down to a more manageable level. I cautiously onlined my optics and then unshuttered one.

"I hate you." I said testing my wing.

"Yes well your fine now so get out of my medbay." He growled

Grumbling I slid off the berth and followed Barricade out.

"You didn't even think to mention that my wing was dislocated?" I demanded as soon as we left the medbay glaring at Barricade more than a little angry.

"Well I figured we were headed there anyway." He replied with an amused glint in his optics "But it did cross my processor."

"Fragger." I said punching his arm

He just chuckled as I walked off very ready to just collapse on my berth.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I own only my OC Shadowfire and changes to existing plot.

Breem- 8.3 minutes

Nano-klick- One second

Klick- 1.2 minutes

Joor-6.5 hours

Solar cycle-One day

Cycle-1.25 hours

.:abcd:.- Comm' link

{abcd}- Bond

Chapter 3

You know that feeling you get that sits at the back of your processor, continuously nags at you saying something is wrong. Yeah I've got that now, normally I would be fine with a mission going off without a hitch. But this is just too perfect especially for our first mission.

The morning went well me and 'Cade checked and cleaned our weapons, received our orders then transformed and set off for the outpost we were assigned to recon. We had no trouble getting by the patrols which were sloppy anyway. Then when we start to observe them nobody was on guard duty or they were slacking.

It was like they wanted us to get there, specifically the patch of crystals that covered the hill we were currently occupying

.:So am I the only one thinking this has been way to easy?:. I asked 'Cade

.:No but we could just be paranoid.:. He responded

As he said that all the troops suddenly dropped the nonchalant act, guards quickly moving to their posts.

.: Hey 'Cade shouldn't that patrol be in our LoS by now?:. I asked that little nagging feeling going into overdrive.

He looked for a moment "Slag." he murmured

.:So time to go then.:. I more stated than asked

.:Yup:. he replied

However as we turned to leave we spotted the patrol approaching from our right. Without a word we quickly changed directions silently moving left.

.:'Cade I have an idea of how to complete our mission:. I said ask we moved .:but it's risky:.

.:And what is this plan:.

.:Well one of us needs to be caught:. I said

.:Let me guess that's me:. Barricade stated as we stopped to scan our surroundings.

.:Well in my defense you can't cloak.:. I reply sheepishly

'Cade contemplated this for a moment.

.:Fine. But you better come rescue me or I swear to Primus..:.

.:You'll come back just to maim me for leaving you with the ever loving Autobots, I know. Now go before they come find both of us:. I said

He vented then walked off. "Glitch." He murmured

.:You know I may just get distracted, these crystals are so beautiful I could just give in to my inner love for shiny things.:. I teased

He vented again but this time to keep from laughing. I watched as he takes off running for a bit before letting himself be caught.

"Good luck." I whispered before cloaking and then following them from a safe distance.

When they reached the entrance watching for a pattern, before deciding to just hop over the wall. I was again glad of the practice I had been doing, which allowed me to A. Land silently and B. Roll without completely slagging my wings.

Before entering the building I decided to place a charge on the wall for a quick escape. Activating its camo I set off hoping finished before its limited battery ran out. As I quickly moved toward the commanders office trying to avoid the few bots in the halls.

Turning into the last hall felt a wave of sadness wash over me. Confused I tried to find where it came from. I reached out(mentally?) and received a sudden feeling of surprise, but before I could do more a dark blue femme tripped over my left ped. This sent her face first into the wall and I felt a sudden sympathy pain. Resisting the urge to rub my own face I watched her disappear around the corner.

Shaking my helm I finally made it to the office and downloaded the schematics and troop strength of the outpost, then went to find Barricade. The poor fragger was stuck arguing with two bots, granted he did seem to be enjoying it.

.:Ready?:. I asked 'Cade forming both of my daggers.

"Yes." He answered aloud

"What?" came the confused question from one of the bots he was tormenting.

I couldn't resist.

"Boo." I said cutting the throat cables of the first, while throwing the other dagger into the second bot's helm.

"Took you long enough." 'Cade said as I unlocked his stasis cuffs.

"Well you seemed to be so entertained, I would have felt bad if I interrupted your fun." I replied watching him form a cannon.

"They didn't even offline your weapons?" I said surprised

"Nope."

"Well cool one less step then." I said turning toward the door. "Coming?" Forming a cannon of my own, and starting toward the exit.

Autobots POV

Chromia vented she was not the least bit happy to be stuck at the pit forsaken outpost. She and Elita had been sent to capture the 'Con scout their source had said would be arriving to recon the outpost. Why the 'Cons cared about it was beyond her but she was still stuck here.

.:'Lita how long till we can take the fragging 'Con and leave:. Chromia asked hoping with all her spark the answer would be now.

.:It's going to be at least a cycle until they finish if he ever answers:.

.:Can I please just threaten him with my cannons and be done with it?" She asked hopefully

.:Chromia!:. Elita Said exasperation evident in her voice.

.:Fine I'll be at the firing range:. Chromia cut the comm stalked off toward the range.

She absentmindly checked on Bumblebee and Ironhide thru their bonds. The femme felt a wave of sadness wash over her spark when she felt the empty space where Shadowfire's used to be. Indulging herself despite knowing she would only get pain for her trouble, she concentrated on where the bond would be and was surprised when instead of pain she felt confusion and curiosity. This revelation was quickly forgotten when she tripped and stumbled into the wall face first.

"Ow." She muttered rubbing her face while picking herself up from the floor.

And that's what I get for giving into my delusions. Chromia thought while walking off to the range.

As she waited for the range to tally her score Chromia heard plasma cannons firing, followed by the outpost's alarm going off.

"What the frag is going on now!" she exclaimed

As soon as she made it outside a section of the wall exploded. When she looked again Chromia spotted two 'Cons sprinting out of the newly made hole. She aimed a few blasts from her cannons through the hole but was stopped short by a sudden pain from her spark. Realizing it had come from the broken bond that had belonged to her daughter.

Chromia quickly closed it surprised it took it this long to act up. And then stormed back into the range to relieve the reawakened anger over her daughters offlining.

Shadowfire POV

I picked myself up from the ground swearing, because apparently wings make fragging amazing targets. Not for the first time I was very glad I was a triple-changer and immediately transformed and drove off after Barricade.

.:What took you so long?:. Barricade asked when I finally caught up.

I was not in the mood for idle conversation not that I was able to focus enough to multi-task anyway.

10 klick later he tried again. I still didn't respond.

A very silent cycle later we finally arrived back at base. Thankfully 'Cade didn't just storm inside 'cus I wasn't sure I would have made it to the medbay on my own.

"'Fire you coming?" He asked

"Yea just..need...a klick." I manage to say between the spikes of pain.

"Fire you ok?" he asked

Instead of talking just transformed painfully and teetered for a nano-klick then started to fall. 'Cade caught me at the last second which is good because I felt no need to add a bruised face to my list of injury's.

Anything after that was lost in a rush of pain and then nothing.

When I onlined the lack of pain caused by my missing wing was very appreciated. The rest of my frame however still hurt. I groaned and unshuttered my optics trying to figure out where I was.

"Femme don't you even think about moving or you'll be welded to that berth." A very familiar gruff voice said.

"Hey Hook," I stated my voice hoarse, I immediately offlined my optics as the room was spinning.

"Before you ask I already downloaded the intel and gave it to Megatron."

"Actually I was going to ask why then room is spinning and I feel like purging." I say having about forgotten about that.

"That is because your equilibrium sensors are damaged." Hook replied

"Please fix them." I begged as even with my optics closed I felt like I was spinning.

"You would need to be stand..."

"Then by all means help me up." I all but demand desperately

Unfortunately the nausea didn't disappear as hoped.

After purging what must have been the entire contents of my tanks I groaned and just laid on the floor next to the waste bin.

"Why did that not help?" I whined

"No it did the rest is because of the virus." Hook said. "So you're stuck here till it passes."

I found out that the virus came from the intel I downloaded, and even then it only got passed my firewalls because of my other injury's. The next 2 orns, _2_ fragging orn's I was stuck in the medbay. Now I may not be a seeker but that doesn't mean I like being cooped up, barley able to stand much less fly for 2 orns.

By the way Hook was able to build me a new wing so at least I wasn't permanently grounded. Then after I recovered me and 'Cade started doing missions again, we completed almost all of them though I did have to "rescue" 'Cade a few more time's. Oh and the Autobots nicknamed me Shadow since they couldn't discover my real Designation.

Funny how they accidently got half of it but it works for me. Something to do with their inability to catch me, so it's like chasing their own shadow.

But wants really weird is the voice in my head, it just randomly pops up. It usually just talks about its day sending emotions, that and asking... no more like begging me to answer, I never have yet it never gives up.

I didn't feel like doing much today I just lay in my berth listening to music. As I was doing so I felt a wave of sadness washover me. I don't enjoy seeing bots I like in pain of any kind and while I didn't talk to it the voice feels... familiar like I knew them.

I don't know exactly how or why but I kind of reached out to them and tried to send comforting feelings. I'm assuming it worked because the feelings changed to happy but with an undertone of apprehension. Then it... ok they slowly reached out like they were afraid I would disappear.

{How am I taking to you?} I asked still confused by what this was.

{It's called a bond} a femme answered {and I'm not sure how we have one.}

I suppose that's ok and now I know how having a bond feels, I kinda like it.

{But why didn't you know that already} she asked her confusion filling me.

{Well I lost my memory so I only remember the last stellar cycle or so} I said

{That's it!} She exclaimed

{Yes that's it I'm very aware that it amounts to nothing, the blink of an optic but that's all I have} I say {and before you say it yes it's horrible. I don't know where I lived, who I knew, I could have had siblings but I don't remember them. I don't know who my creators were what they did, if they loved me or not, nothing.}

I was in tears now but I felt better voicing my true feelings out loud (figuratively). I can only imagine what she felt over the bond.

Primus for all intents I feel like nothing more than a large, battle trained, and emotionally scarred sparkling. I guess technically I am as there is way too much I don't know. Like my cycle or how sparklings are created and Primus knows what else.

{I have to check something ok but I'll be back soon} the femme said in a soothing tone.

And now I'm being talked to like one. I vent but I'm glad she did as the annoying irrational fear has been relieved. But I still had to know one thing.

{Wait...c-can you at least tell me your designation} I asked nervously

There was a long pause and I was afraid she had already left.

{Chromia} and then she closed her end of the bond.

I almost glitched.

"Slag it to the pit."

Chromia POV

Right so the only way to figure this out is by talking to a medic. But did it really have to be Ratchet?

"Ratch' can I talk to you for a klick?" I asked

Ratchet looked up from the data pad he was reading, after giving me a quick scan he motioned to a seat.

"Yes." he said simply

"Can you please just ask before scanning." I said venting

"I figured it would save time if it were something embarrassing." He replied

I just vented and glared.

"Anyway is it possible for two bots with broken bonds to create a new bond." I asked

Ratchet was now looking at me suspiciously.

"No at least I've never heard of it. Chromia is there something you want to tell me?" He said narrowing his optics.

"No." I say truthfully because I really don't want to.

"Then if that's it get out of my medbay." Ratchet said returning to his data pad. I vented before walking out the door.

I've never really believed in Primus but he's the only explanation for this.

I reopened the bond after I was back in my quarters.

{Hello?} I said

{Hi your back ummm right, I know that I barely know you but I can't lose you.} The femme said seeming so much like a nervous sparkling.

{Why would you lose me?} I ask

{Well when you said your designation was Chromia did you mean like Autobot warrior Chromia?} She asked

{Yes but how is that a problem?} I asked now confused. The very strong feelings of anxiety and fear coming thru the bond weren't helping.

{I'm afraid you won't like me.} She admitted

Now I'm suspicious.

{Why?}

{My designation i-is Shadow} She said, the fear and apprehension suddenly skyrocketing.

Shado...Oh..oh pit

{Chromia?} Shadow asked cautiously.

{How'd you end up with the Decepticons?} I asked trying to stall 'til I could figure out what to do.

This prompted her to start her life story. I guess I can see why she would stay, especially with no knowledge of right or wrong. I however can almost guarantee Shadow wasn't told everything they have done. So I'll just have to teach her.

{Chromia you don't... hate me do you?} She asked

I vented slowly {No Shadow I don't}

Shadowfire POV

The last few orns have been very repetitive. Me and 'Cade doing our usual mission's with the occasional assassination thrown in, mainly bots that have defected. Though there has been interesting moments, like when like my lesson's with Chromia.

She's taken it upon herself to teach me about the war like how it started etc, as well as more... femmely topic's like um... bonding and interfacing. Now I know why it seems like every mech stares at my aft when I walk by... it's 'cus they are. Oh and apperantly I have a crush on Barricade. But I didn't find this until after the fragger decided to play with my wings during one of my nightly lessons with Chromia.

One klick I'm laying outside "reading" aka listening to Chromia talk about the matrix of leadership, and the next I'm... purring from sensations I didn't even know were possible radiating from my wings. I'm sure you can imagine her confusion when she suddenly felt pleasure, contentment, and emotions I didn't recognize thru our bond.

After he stopped I of course asked what the pit he was doing. Apperantly he was just curious if wings could cause pleasure or just pain, and I was then only bot he could experiment on and not get offlined. Not that I didn't feel like doing so at the moment. The slagger then just walked off like nothing happened.

Then I had to explain to Chromia what happened. She of course thought it was hilarious. Then she started to tease me about my apperantly crush on Barricade, which explained the odd feelings.

And now here I am being tormented by what has become 'Cade's favorite past time.

"Primus can you please not do that." I whined once I was capable of doing so.

Why the frag do my wings have to be so sensitive?

He just chuckled but thankfully I received a comm before he could start again.

.:Shadowfire report to the throne room immediately:. Came Megatrons voice.

He then ended the comm before I could respond.

"Bye I've got to report to Megs." I told him more than happy to escape.

When I arrived I found both Megatron and Soundwave waiting

"You summoned me m'lord?" I say kneeling

"Yes I have a mission for you, I've just heard from one of Soundwave's agents. He says that he has very important intelligence." He said "Normally I'd send a recruit but I thought you might like a chance to stretch your wings."

"Thank you lord Megatron."

After he handed me the credits for the agent I left. After a quick thought to Chromia asking her not to bother me while I'm on my mission closed the bond, then took-off doing occasional acrobatics on my way to the meeting point.

When I arrived I circled a bit 'cus that nagging feeling in my processor was back, but my scan's came up clear. I cloaked then landed near the meeting point. As I walked up I spotted a small bot but better safe than sorry.

.:Intel agent Dart?:. I ask on the comm channel I was given.

The bots head came up and started to look around.

.:Oh so you've finally arrived.:. He said

.:It wasn't exactly a short flight:.

.:Oh a seeker then:. He said looking up

I vented. Why do they always assume that if you fly you're a seeker? Granted I do look similar

.:No:. I say uncloaking about 10 feet from him.

"Shadow!" He said paling

I just rolled my optics, but then I feel Chromia prodding at the bond.

"Yes is that a problem?" I ask dryly ignoring her

"Well..." He trailed off

"Well what?" I growl wanting to be done. Chromia is still trying to get my attention and if anything is even more insistent.

"I actually don't have any intel." Dart says backing away.

Before I can respond I hear a deep voice followed by the sound of charging cannons, many cannons.

"Don't move 'Con." The large black mech ordered "or there won't be enough slag to make a bolt."

I figure I may as well answer Chromia now.

{Why didn't you answer before?} Her voice hissed over the bond

{You knew didn't you.} I stated getting straight to the point.

{Yes but I didn't know you would be here!}

Wait here? I look around until I see a dark blue femme glaring at me.

{Oh well this is awkward} Chromia's optics narrowed a bit more.

{You do realize I can't help you right, and have to treat you like just another 'Con?} She said her emotions going all over.

"On your knee's 'Con" She said aloud

{Yup though if you could at least keep from injuring my wings that would be appreciated} I say

I pretend to think about it.

"As fun as that sounds I have to decline." I reply

Unfortunately a yellow bot to my right decided to yank me down by one of said wings.

"She said on your knees." He said as he did so.

I closed the bond so Chromia was cut off from the searing pain now shooting thru me.

"You have one chance to release my wing." I ground out.

"As fun as that so..."

I didn't even let him finish before I shove a dagger thru his wrist kick his legs out from under him. I ended straddling him with my second dagger to his throat and his arm pinned to the ground by the first.

"I why is nobody ever takes me seriously?" I asked nobody in particular

"Let Sunstreaker go now." Ironhide said. I probably should have recognized him sooner.

"Sunstreaker sounds familiar... oh right he and his twin are the ones with the wing fetishes." I said

"What?" Pretty much everybody exclaimed

"Well they're always chasing after seekers, and the only thing they have that other bots don't is wings." I stated matter of factly.

I heard a femme giggle quietly behind me, Sideswipe however is growling.

"Let him go." Chromia demanded

"Not until I get an apology from Sunny here." I said a playful glint in my optics.

The pink femme on my right vented.

"Fine I'm sorry." Sunny said

I vented slowly

"Can't you at least pretend to mean it?" I ask

This leads to more growling.

"I'm sorry." He said again

"Good enough." I say before sprinting toward a nearby scrap pile. You know for once it would be nice if I could pull off the impossible, like making it to the pile untouched. But no I not only took what is quickly becoming the usual damage to my wings, but I was also hit just above the knee by what had to be a plasma rifle round.

After skidding to a very ungraceful stop I tried to get up only to find I couldn't move my leg... at all.

"Ow." I'm going to have to make a mental note to never do that again. I was made aware of their proximity when one of them prodded my wing with a barrel.

"I'm not offline fragger, and did we not just have a discussion about wings." I hissed.

"So how are we getting her on to the ship?" I heard a femme ask.

Great they didn't even plan this far ahead.

"She can walk." Sunsteaker or Sideswipe said. Nope not happening.

"Tell you what I'll blow a hole in your leg and we can walk together. You know solidarity and what not." I retorted

I heard somebody vent before they decided to move the discussion on to their internal comm's. They finally started moving when the sound of a ships engines filled the air. I knew it was theirs because there was a blatant lack of panic. They moved me onto the ship and into what I'm assuming was the medbay. That is where I spent the entire trip. At least I think so but it's hard to keep track when you've been sedated.

When I onlined I was in a cell with all of my wounds patched up. I guess it could be worse, though I was taken to the medbay now and again. I swear Ratchet is the grumpiest medic I ever met. Anyway I spent the next orn in the cell as it's hard to escape when you can't even stand up.

On the bright side I did see Chromia on one of said trips. Not that we could talk to each other but it was still nice. When I could finally walk I decided it was time leave. See while they offlined my weapons I had something else, the very nifty retractable claws I had Hook install in my servos and peds. I don't know exactly how he did it, but for whatever reason my systems don't register them as weapons.

Though it did take me forever to figure out how to use those, however situations like this made all that time worth it. Why, because short of removing them there is no way to keep me from using my claws. The guards didn't stand a chance, of course it helped they didn't know about the claws.

After I finished with them I cloaked (for whatever reason my defensive systems can't be offlined, but it hurts like pit whenever they try.) and consulted the map I had downloaded from the guard. Hmm apperantly I'm in Iacon... this sucks how the pit am I supposed to escape Iacon?

Before I had time to even start planning another guard walked in and spotted the other two on the floor. I don't think I've ever wanted my daggers more than that one moment. Don't get me wrong I still offlined him, but not before he hit the oh so convenient alarm located next to the door.

Why can it never be easy? If I could I would have blown a hole in a wall and flew off. But any charge's I had were taken from my subspace, they even took my paint. Why I don't know but I didn't really have time to worry about that right now.

After locating the armory on the map I set off sticking to the walls as bots ran by. When I finally reached my destination I hacked the keypad and step inside. After checking to be sure the room was empty I uncloaked and started searching for a weapon I could use. I settled on a plasma rifle, two energon charges, and a few grenades.

Subspacing the explosives I cloaked and turned only for the door to open to admit Chromia and both of her sisters. Great 3 of the only Autobot I can't bring myself to offline, (if only because I know Chromia would slag me) are the only thing between me and freedom. I think Primus was bored and I'm the lucky bot he decided to use for entertainment.

"Why are we here again?" (Flare-up I think) asked

"Because Chromia forgot her rifle after the last "shooting" session she had with Ironhide." Arcee said smirking

I really didn't need to hear that.

"We don't have time for idle chatter so if you'll just help me find it, we can go after that pit-spawned 'Con." Chromia said not in the least bit phased.

That was uncalled for, I'm not that bad.

"Wow you don't even remember where you left it?" Flare-up said holding back laughter.

I decided to intervene before I had to de-frag my processor.

"As entertaining as this is I have place's to be." I said grabbing Flare-up and a sword that I then held to her throat.

Arcee spun around onlining her cannon while Chromia grabbed a nearby pistol.

"Let her go." Arcee demanded

"How about you offline your weapons and then I let her go." I said backing toward the door.

{What are you doing?"} Chromia half growled over our bond.

{Escaping, now I'm not going to offline her. So if you could get your sister to stop we can end this charade.} I replied.

She growled aloud.

"Arcee do what she says." Chromia said sounding angry but resigned.

"What! Do you really trust her word." She exclaimed.

"No. But we don't have a choice." Chromia replied.

Venting Arcee offlined her weapon "Fine now let her go."

By now I was at the door. "Ok." I said before throwing Flare-up at Arcee, hoping Chromia didn't actually shoot me.

I then ducked out the door and shoved the sword into the keypad, effectively locking them inside. I then placed both charges on the outer wall moved away blew them and jumped out of the hole transforming flying off toward where my gps said Kaon was.

After a solar cycle I reached Kaon and reported to Megs. He... wasn't very happy about the lack of intel or that I "let" myself be captured. I onlined yet another solar cycle later with a broken leg strut and a large dent in my helm.

It's only gotten worse from there, apperantly making a reputation for myself means getting beaten if I do anything wrong. Any "weakness" that I show is noticed, and guess what the punishment is for that. Yup more beatings, the brig, less energon or maybe all three, depends on Megatrons mood or Starscreams whoevers around at the time.

On top of that instead of mostly ignoring me like before it seems like every mech wants to interface with me. Then there was the time I was almost raped. Luckily 'Cade was able to stop them because as good as I maybe, I can only fight so many at the same time. Of course that was when I still cared about hurting them to badly.

Now dealing with that for 2 vorns, did you really think I wouldn't change? Instead of being caring and fun, I'm more sadistic and cold sparked. It started as an act, a lie I built to keep me safe. But you can only live a lie for so long before it becomes a reality. But that was their plan wasn't it?

The only ones I treat the same are Barricade and Chromia, though only in private. Barricade is the only one who actually see's what little there is left of the old me. We still talk in my room and he is the only one who I'll let touch me. I finally told him that I liked him after he kept me from being... used by the other mech's.

Surprisingly he felt the same. Though considering how he was always rubbing my wings it made sense. So I guess we both have a little safe haven with each other. But to all the others we're just the merciless and cruel hunter assassin team.

Yet we get stuck with guard duty.


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I own only my OC Shadowfire and changes to existing plot.

Breem- 8.3 minutes

Nano-klick- One second

Klick- 1.2 minutes

Joor-6.5 hours

Solar cycle-One day

Cycle-1.25 hours

.:abcd:.- Comm' link

{abcd}- Bond

Chapter 4

"How long 'til we arrive." I demanded stopping for a moment.

The shuttle pilot cleared his throat nervously. "It sh-should only be an-another breem." He stuttered

Growling I resumed my pacing of the shuttle's interior. 'Cade chuckled obviously amused by the pilots reaction. I however I am annoyed by the fact that we were assigned to guard prisoners, I don't care how important they are it's not what we do. Of course it's probably just Starscream trying to get us out of his way. Nothing's gone right since Tyger Pax.

First Megatron leaves to follow the cube, then Starscream takes over and randomly assigns Frenzy to 'Cade and I's team. That fragger is so annoyingly over energetic but we're stuck with him. Thankfully he's in Barricade's hold at the moment, because I refused to put up with him during the flight.

At least we're only here for an orn, then we leave to search for the Allspark and Megatron. I think it caused Starscream physical pain to include that. I was very happy to get off the shuttle when it arrived. The happy feeling lasted until I learned who the prisoners were.

Chromia POV

I knew the raid was a bad idea. But we needed the energon and parts so we had no choice. Elita volunteered to lead it so of course I had to go, and by default my sister's. Dart was brought along only because the extra bot might have mattered in the long run.

We made it into the outpost but as soon as we went to leave all pit broke loose. Dart and I got separated from Elita and my sisters almost immediately. They made it most of the way out before they notice we were missing. But by then they couldn't reach us, and I couldn't get to them carrying Dart. But they still wouldn't leave until I pointed out that if they go captured it would take a long time to find us. That is if they ever did.

So here I am resting in my cell trying to ignore the 2 guards. The only bots in the "prison" are a medic and the two guards that's it, apperantly it's very small. My thoughts were interrupted by the sound of engine's overhead.

"Finally we can leave this scrap heap." one of the guards said leaving the room.

"You know I almost feel sorry for you." The other guard said looking at me and Dart.

"And why is that." Dart asked. I didn't pay attention to what was being said, as I was trying to focus on the bonds with my sisters. However this was interrupted by a very loud voice in my head.

{WHEN THE PIT DID YOU GET CAPTURED?} Came Shadow's voice

I winced from the sudden processor ache I now had.

{Hey long time no see Shadow.} I replied

{I wanted the next time to be under better conditions.} She growled {This is would be the opposite.}

{How is this worse last time you were injured and in a cell, I'm just in a cell?}

{The Autobots don't torture there prisoner's for information} Shadow said before closing her side of the bond.

I really hope Elita gets here soon.

{Chromia you there?} Came Arcee's voice

{Arcee I really hope your close by}

Shadowfire POV

Of all the bots Chromia has to be captured why does this always happen? Wait isn't the other bot part of their intel team? Hmm maybe I can have 'Cade interrogate them first, yea that could work. I thought as I walked into the cell area. I stopped when I say who the other bot was. Oh this will definitely work I think I might tell 'Cade to take his time too, the happy feeling returning tenfold as I looked at Dart.

"Well well well look who it is." I said deactivating the bars to Dart's cell.

"Shadow!" He exclaimed suddenly very pale

I didn't even know a bot could get that pale without having white paint.

"Oh you remember good then you know how happy I am to see you." I said extending my claws and picking him up by his chassis.

So... I miiight blame everything that's happened since then on Dart.

He couldn't even say anything not that I noticed thru the red haze I was currently seeing.

{Shadow stop!} Chromia yelled through the bond.

I froze and blinked surprised to find myself holding a dagger to Darts throat. My entire time with the 'Cons I've never killed without reason, yet here I am almost cutting a prisoner's throat. I dropped the dagger and pulled a sedative and injected enough into Dart to keep him offline for a few cycles.

I dropped Dart and picked up my dagger before leaving his cell and activating the energon bars. I know Chromia can feel the veritable storm of emotions coming from me as I sit on the berth in front of her cell. I remotely locked the door and activate the sound proofing. I just sat there for a few klicks finally realizing how much I've changed.

"How did you do it?" I asked "With two words you pull me out of an act I've lived for vorns, yet I've only met you twice and one you were shooting at me." I'm not even looking at her... just staring at the dagger in my servo.

"I don't know," She said "but what happened to after you escaped. I couldn't tell over the bond but your... different."

I know she's right even when I was leaking energon from a hole in my leg, and surrounded by Autobots, who would have loved nothing more than to offline me I teased them. Yet now I can't even remember the last time I even did so with 'Cade. On a whim I offlined the bars of Chromia's cell part of me hoping she would offline me and end my misery, save me from myself.

Yet instead Chromia, fierce Decepticon hating Autobot warrior Chromia, held me while I cried for the first time in over two vorns. I just let her, glad I was actually able to still do so. I don't know how long we sat there but I eventually was able to compose myself.

"You know you don't have to stay with the 'Cons." Chromia said breaking the silence

"And where would I go?" I asked "I can't see the Autobots just letting me join, not after everything I've done."

"Optimus would he's willing to give anybody a fair chance." She said

"I doubt it, besides he's not even on Cybertron now so it doesn't matter." I said "And I'm sure I would still need somebody to vouch for me and you're the only bot who would. The only way for me to get a chance is if we all end up on the same planet."

"But if we did?" Chromia asked. I can tell she won't let this go.

"If by some amazing chance that happens yes I'll do it, but only if Barricade can as well." Trying not to pay attention to the fact that we are bartering for my allegiance.

I suddenly vented a thought crossing my processor.

"Do you know what I just realized?" I asked

"What?" She said

"Well this is one of the oddest most unlikely relationships ever, and nobody would ever believe it if we told them." I said. The peaceful moment was then broken by a comm from Barricade.

.:Shadow can you come here for a klick?:.

That's weird why would he call me Shadow over the comm, he only calls me that when were not...

"I think your rescue has arrived." I said

.:Yup just give me a klick:. I replied

"Really?" Chromia said pausing for a nano-klick "Hmm so it has."

"You know I can't leave you out here right?" I said but not really wanting her to go.

"I suppose that would raise questions." she said amusement in her voice.

After I activated the bars again I turned back.

"Chromia?"

"Yes?"

"I just wanted to say... thank you for... well believing there's still good in me." I said before grabbing Dart and opening the door.

I was greeted by the sight of Barricade with Sunstreakers sword to his throat, as well as the cannons of every other bot pointing at me.

"Well fancy seeing you here, and how are the seekers treating you?" I said

This got an amused look from Barricade and a growl from Sunny.

"Aww that bad, sorry but I'm not available at the moment," I said "and threatening Barricade won't change my mind. So this is really quite simple, if you want your friends alive let Barricade go."

"And what you'll just let them free, why do I not believe that." Arcee practically growled

I cocked my helm to the side "What you believe is irrelevant because I can guarantee that if you don't, they will be offlined along with whoever else I take with me." I said

"Over m..."

"Enough." Elita said interrupting Flare-up

"If we let Barricade go will you do the same for our friends?" Elita asked

"If he is allowed to join me unharmed your beloved friends will be allowed to do the same."

She thought on this for a moment watching me intently.

"Sunstreaker let him go." She said finally

"What! Elita you can-" Arcee started

"I am we don't really have a choice regardless." Elita said not taking her optics off of me.

It took her repeating herself to get Sunstreaker to release 'Cade. He slowly walked over to me.

"Now if you hold this I'll go release your comrade." I said handing Dart to 'Cade.

{Well that went well.} I said as I entered the cell area Chromia

{Only because 'Lita was here but yes.} She replied

I rolled my optics. {Whatever, now come on act the part.}I said as I deactivated the bars.

"Told you I wouldn't be here long 'Con." She said sounding smug.

{I didn't mean right now they can't even hear you.} I said picking her up.

As we… well I walked out the door holding a very annoyed looking Chromia I saw Dart was onlining.

"Oh and I was afraid you would have leave without saying goodbye." I said letting Chromia drop the ten or so feet to the ground. I ignored her glare and complaints.

I leaned against the wall look and extended my claws inspecting them.

"One feisty blue femme and cowardly mech as promised." I said giving Dart a shove with my ped.

Chromia growled before she started toward Elita, who looked relived I was actually keeping my word.

I watched them carefully until they left, which is about when 'Cade started stroking my wings. I let him 'cus I'd be lying if I said I hadn't missed it. I also knew it was only because of my pretty much constant irritated state that he had stopped doing so.

"I've been a glitch lately haven't I." I said and 'Cade just hummed in agreement before hesitantly brushing an extremely sensitive part of my wing. I stiffened but was unable to hold back a moan. I know what he wanted to do I'm not as naive, as I was before. But it's never went farther than this because a large part of me was afraid he was only using me.

Now I know he actually care's but that fear is still there. I thought about this for a klick before I turned and caught his servo's. I kneeled so I was at his optic level and looked into them trying to discern his intentions. Making my decision I kissed him before standing up and walking away. I stopped after a few feet looking back.

"Are you coming or not?" I asked with a grin only to laugh out loud at his expression, before practically dragging him towards his temporary room.

I decided to live my life, enjoy it as best as I can. Why the sudden change? Well they say every bot has a darkside, I've lived solely in mine for vorns and I never realized what it kept from me. Now that I have, I never want to go back.

Space so many way's to describe it, but only a few come to mind now. Mysterious... is the only positive one, desolate, depressing and boring are far easier to think of. Needless to say after vorns of searching for the Allspark following its trail of radiation there wasn't much to do. In fact I'll just list them talk with 'Cade, interface, report to Starscream, recharge, listen to Frenzy annoy 'Cade while I watch the sensors, get annoyed by Frenzy while 'Cade watches the sensor's, simulations. That gets boring after a few orn's much less vorns.

The only good thing that's happened my entire time on this fragging ship in that me and 'Cade have gotten alot closer. I wouldn't say we love each other... yet anyway but we more than just care about each other. I know we've both changed alot, for the better though. There is alot we can't change. Our love of hunting is a very good example, doesn't really matter what it is. I could go on and on but suffice it to say some things are just ingrained, they fade but never disappear.

Anyway we found were we think the Allspark is and had been ordered to find information. We narrowed down our search to the United States of America. Naturally after Blackouts failed attempt to get intel from a remote base, Barricade and I were sent down to try another source. The data Frenzy retrieved from the human aircraft Air Force One led us to a Samuel Witwicky.

Of course I opened my mouth saying that we should try to get the boy stealthily. This led to Starscream ordering me and 'Cade to "move into" Tranquility, Nevada and me having to "infiltrate" the high school as a student to find what we need from the Witwicky boy. All of this is of course really just a way for Starscream to punish me and still get the information he wants.

Fragger


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I own only my OC Shadowfire and changes to existing plot.

AN: If you don't review I don't know how I'm doing, and my opinion is a bit biased.

Breem- 8.3 minutes

Nano-klick- One second

Klick- 1.2 minutes

Joor- 6.5 hours

Solar cycle- One day

Cycle- 1.25 hours

Vorn- 83 years

.:abcd:.- Comm' link

{abcd}- Bond

"abcd"- Cybertronian

abcd- Thought's

Chapter 4

When I onlined in the morning I was happy. At least I was happy until processor started hurting, Screamer hadn't been impressed with my lack of progress. Of course I had to point out it was only because I had to go to the human's school, and how idiotic of a plan that was. He threw me through a wall, apperantly the only wall in our base not falling apart. This all could have been avoided if I had just kept silent and let Screamer go thru with his plan to offline that Witwicky.

But no my morality had to rear its obnoxiously loud head. Hmpf. And on top of that now that I told 'Cade about my bond with Chromia he's barely talked to me.

At least it's the last day I have to go thru the torture humans call high school. I really didn't think anything could be so painful without causing physical harm, and I was only stuck there for a month.

Thankfully I was allowed to choose my name. I chose Kira Blaze. Kira means darkness so it's similar to Shadow, Blaze well... it's obvious. Apperantly so is my Alt-mode a 2007 Lamborghini Gallardo. I didn't realize until I drove into the high school parking lot that for humans popular does not equal common. So despite the dark coloring (black as a well... shadow and a dark blue I don't remember having before) there was not a single human who missed the 200,000 dollar "car" that was "driven" by the 17 year old "girl".

Of course it didn't get better from there, no apperantly the holoform I chose was as attractive as my alt-mode. I'm honestly not sure which got more attention. That basically catapulted me to the top of the social ladder, I had unwittingly done the exact opposite of blending in.

To make it just that much more difficult I had to pretend not to know as much as I did. Honestly I could as the humans say "do it in my sleep". Except I literally could and if not for having to keep track of conversations I would have. I easily got into all off Witwickys classes, of course once there was nothing to do. I spent most of the day's playing solitaire or on any number of gaming sites.

Anyway because of my "popular" status I was unable to create a "friendship" with Witwicky, if only because he couldn't actually form a complete sentence if I tried. I did however find myself actually liking the human female Mikaela Banes, I think it was her fiery personality (I think that the correct term).

I managed to drag myself to where we hid our energon. I really hated having to pretend we owned this house. Spending most of the day in my alt-mode is not anything close to fun. After finishing my energon I set off for the high school.

I pulled into an open spot and stepped out of my alt-mode. It's still a little weird controlling two bodies at once, but it's gotten a lot easier now. I then spotted Mikaela waving at me and headed over to her.

"Hey excited for the last day of school." She asked as we walked toward our first class, sounding way too happy for my current mood.

"Hmm, oh yeah of course." I replied distractedly.

"Kira you ok?" She asked giving me a searching look.

"Yea I've just got a pr-head ache." I said and it's not helping my concentration.

"Well at least it's our last day." She said still way to happy, but she did lower her voice a little.

I didn't bother answering as we walked into class.

Thankfully the day passed quickly and I was now sitting in my final class of the day, listening to Witwicky give his report. Great not only do I have to deal with this fragging processor ache but I get to stare at the cause. I hate those fragging glasses, my life would be amazing without them.

It was now that I saw a faint signal on my scanner.

.:'Cade none of you are near the school are you?:. I asked after he connected.

It took a second for him to reply.

.:No.:. He replied

That means I've just found our elusive Autobot friend.

A small smile formed on my face as I responded

.:I'll comm you if I need help:. I said cutting the link.

The bell rang then and I practically sprinted to my alt. The day was beginning to look alot better now. I checked to make sure my spark signature was cloaked before driving toward the 'Bots location. I followed their signature to a used car lot, but couldn't single them out from the cars.

I watched as Sam and his father walked over with the owner looking at car's. I was contemplating rebooting my sensor's when a very high pitched sound burst from the beat up Camaro shattering all the other vehicles window's. Well that's one way to find him. However any happiness I felt disappeared when Witwicky bought the Camaro.

.:'Cade I've run into a slight glitch.:.

.:What now:. He growled

.:The Witwicky boy just purchased the Autobot.:. I said. After a few seconds of silence I thought he might have glitched.

.:What?:. He finally said disbelief clear in his voice.

.:The Autobot is now the boy's car:. I said

.:And your telling me this why?:.

.:I don't want to deal with Screamer's voice right now so I was hoping you would.:.

He growled a little at this before answering.

.:Fine femme I will speak to Starscream for you.:. He said cutting the link.

Femme? Really? I know he's mad but now he won't even use my name. At least he agreed to talk to Screamer. I didn't get any more time to contemplate this before I had to follow the boy home. After few minutes of just sitting across from their house Barricade commed me back.

.:Starscream has decided you will stay and observe the Autobot at all times.:. He said

.:At all times? How the frag am I supposed to do that?:.

.:Park across the street? I don't really care.:. He snapped

Alright enough is enough.

.:Is it really that hard to accept?:. I asked trying not to show my frustration.

.:That you're bonded to an Autobot, the enemy?:.

.:Oh come on it's not like were fragging sparkmate's:. I snapped as now my processor was starting to hurt even worse.

.:You still have a bond and she's probably using you to get information.:.

.:Really? Do you really think I'd just let her waltz thru my processor?:. I asked now very annoyed.

.:I said nothing about you allowing her to.:. He said suddenly sounding happy about something.

If they could have my optics would have narrowed.

.:And what is it you're implying?:. I asked my voice ice cold.

.:I am simply stating you wouldn't realize if you were being used.:. He said in that same satisfied tone.

.:'Cade we've been courting for vorns and you've know me for longer-:.

.:You're only proving my point.:. He said

I had a sudden sense of foreboding creeping into my spark.

.:What do you mean?:. I asked cautiously who else could need info from me? I thought.

.:That you never noticed I was doing the same, only I wasn't using you for information.:. He said sounding so proud of himself.

.:W-What?:.

.:After all of the bots I used and betrayed did it really never occur that I might be doing the same to you, one of the only femme's among the Decepticon's?:. He said in a condescending tone before cutting the link, leaving me to deal with the aching pain the revelation left in my spark.

The rest of the night went by slowly and when he finally left I followed Witwicky when he drove off with another boy for the lake party. For whatever reason Witwickys friend started to climb a tree, while Sam had an argument Mikaela's current boyfriend. I watched as after their argument Mikaela started to walk off down the road. As I debated whether or not to drive her home when Witwicky pulled up to her and convinced her to get in.

I watched as the "car" had engine trouble and Mikaela got out to check it. She started to walk home again only for the "car's" engine to suddenly start, while the radio played baby come back. I think the Autobot might have a few screws loose. After she was dropped off at her house Mikaela called me.

We talked for a bit before we got to the reason for her call.

.:So why weren't you at the party?:. She asked

Slag I had forgotten I promised to go.

.:Sorry I was... distracted.:. I said hoping she would leave it at that.

.:By what?:. She asked now curious.

I almost lied before I realized I didn't have one to tell.

.:Kira?:.

Frag it to the pit. She would know if I lied anyway fragging human lie detector.

So I found myself telling what had happened minus, anything about cybertronian in origin. While it was nice to tell someone that wasn't just going to magically fix the problem. Finding out you've been used for all intents purpose's as an interface toy for vorns is not something any human can truly comprehend, and while lost in thought I somehow ended up agreeing to go with Mikaela to lunch. I can't even eat there fragging food. I just sat across from the Witwickys house sulking.

I was pulled out of this primus knows how much later by the sound of a engine starting. I cloaked and watched as the Autobot drove away with Witwicky following on his bike. Any other time I might have just looked on in disbelief, but confused as my emotions were I found it hilarious.

I followed them until they reached the junkyard. The boy got stuck waiting for a train to pass, but I transformed and hopped over it landing silently as always. I moved to the left until I could see the 'Bot as he sent a transmission into the sky. I heard barking and looked to my left to see the boy running off chased by two dogs, the Autobot followed not long after.

I've observed by now that Sam doesn't have the best luck. This held true as he was arrested for trespassing. As I seem to have lost the yellow bot I decided to just find a quiet place to get some recharge. When I onlined in the morning I decided to just fly around until lunch. Transforming into my F-22 alt-mode I took off and spent the next few hours over the desert doing acrobatics, and taking comfort in the feeling of the wind against my wings.

Lunch was going as well as I had expected. After Mikaela picked "me" up she drove us to a restaurant to eat with some of her friends. I watched them eat smiling when I was reminded of my impulsive raid. Ok it wasn't really a raid, more like me stopping by the base and taking a good number of energon cubes in my subspace. I don't plan to stay with the 'Con's much longer.

My thoughts were interrupted my Witwicky crashing his... pink? bike in front of me. I didn't pay attention to his word's as I noticed the familiar yellow Camaro that now seems to be chasing its owner. After Witwicky rode off, Mikaela excused herself and walked over to her scooter. I followed her figuring that it wouldn't hurt to find out what Witwicky was up to now.

"What you didn't think I was going to stay behind did you?" I asked

She just rolled her op-eye's and then we were off. When we finally found him he was running toward us waving his arms. The next thing I know I'm on the ground and my back is hurting.

"What the frag!" I gasped out. Holoform it may be but that doesn't mean I won't feel pain. It was designed to be as real as possible, hell it's supposed to scan as a human to. However any questions were lost in the sudden appearance of a certain black and white mech.

As I was deciding whether or not to transform and beat the slag out of him, I was shoved into the Autobot that suddenly appeared. This was a decidedly awkward position, and hopefully the holoform works as it's designed to. I however got the privilege of simultaneously listening to two teenagers scream and follow without being detected. My processor ache didn't help matters.

The Autobot eventually hid at the power plant, locking the doors before the humans could get out. The Autobot and the humans seemed to think being quite would help. I knew it wouldn't me and Barricade have had much harder hunts. That thought sent a sharp pain thru my spark.

Then we were off again past Barricade only to be dumped out of the Autobot's alt-mode before he transformed in front of us. The humans found this fascinating, I was trying why I had the urge to protect him. I was able to ignore that urge until, I saw the yellow 'Bot take a bad hit from the mace. A shot from my rifle disabled his knee, that was enough for the Camaro to recover enough to hit Barricade with a cannon blast and knock him off the embankment.

He then looked around obviously trying to find where the shot came from.

"I'm not going to harm you so put it away." I said before uncloaking. Figuring now was as good as ever considering I'm fragged if I go back to the Decepticon's.

He just stared at me in complete shock not even moving. I sighed

"What have you never seen a femme before?" I said a little annoyed.

The Autobot just walked up to me and poked me like he was making sure I was real. The next thing I knew I was pulled into a hug. I was very confused by this turn of events. I pushed him away not sure what he was up to, and the Camaro looked confused and... hurt? that I'd did so.

"I understand you being happy I saved your aft but what the pit was that?" I asked. I received a hail on an open comm line.

.:Yes?:. I said

.:So you don't remember me?:. A younger mech's voice said.

.:How can I remember someone I've never meet.:. I said although my processor ache was getting worse listening to him.

He cut the link looking more hurt and confused than before. It was now that I heard yelling to my right and finally remembered the humans.

The Autobot walked over to them. I tuned them out until I heard the name Kira.

"Sam do you know where she went? Did something happen to her?" Mikaela asked very worried. I was not looking forward to this.

"You won't find her Mikaela." I said activating my holoform right infront of her. She just looked shocked for a second before she started getting a little angry.

"What so she's fake?" She said looking at me.

"Well yes and no she's my holoform." I replied

"So everything was a lie." Mikaela said sounding pissed which is understandable as she just found out her friend was a cover.

"Not everything, some little stuff yes but nothing else." I said hoping she wouldn't start ranting.

She however seemed to have picked up on the fact I hadn't lied about being used, because she went from anger to sympathy.

"Kira I'm so-"

I deactivated my holoform and kneeled in front of her cutting her off.

"If you ever tell anyone about that you will not live to see the end of the day!" I hissed my voice ice cold.

She managed to nod despite having a 26 foot tall robot in her face. I turned to see the Autobot about to walk over, so I moved and transformed down to my Gallardo alt.

"Are we going or you just going to chat all night?" I asked

This got the 'Bot to transform and open his door. I was glad and yet slightly disappointed when both Witwicky and Mikaela went to the other bot though Sam did have to convince Mikaela to get in. I followed them until the mech suddenly stopped infront of a tunnel and the teen's got out.

"What happened now?" I asked as I pulled up next to them.

They ignored me and continued arguing until a much newer Camaro pulled up. I'm not sure how old he is but judging by his voice and miniature tantrum he just had, he can't be much more than a youngling. Anyway now that his alt-mode no longer looked like "a piece of crap" as it had apperantly been called, we set off again. After a quick stop to let the human gape at the incoming bots, we pulled into an abandoned area.

I cloaked then transformed when I saw other headlights as I really didn't need them to shot me on sight. I looked at the 'Bots around me and was rewarded with a happy feeling followed by a stab of pain thru my processor when I saw Ironhide. I really need to figure out what the frag is going on. I thought.

After Prime's explanation I was still waiting for the mech Bumblebee(whose name had prompted another stab of pain) to tell them I was there. Finally I had enough waiting

.:Forget something?:. I asked

He visibly started before giving an apologetic chirp that reminded me way too much of Scorpy. I'm guessing he commed them all because all except Prime went from relaxed to having their weapons ready.

"See this is how you were supposed to react." I said looking at Bumblebee as I uncloaked. I turned to the others to see the same shocked look on their face's as Bumblebee had.

"Primus does the blue really make that much difference or is my protoform showing?" I asked looking myself over.

Hearing the whining of charging cannons I looked up to see Ironhide aiming both of his at me.

"Really? Did you miss the part where I saved them or can you just not process it?" I asked sarcastically

"Ironhide stand down." Came Prime's baritone voice.

"But Prime!"

"Ironhide if Shadow had meant to harm us she would have done so already." He said.

Ironhide growled but offlined his cannons, he didn't however stop watching me.

"Ratchet long time no see." I said with fake enthusiasm

Being the grumpy old mech he is he just grunted and glared at me.

Prime turned toward me then, I know what he's going to ask.

"My reasons are and will stay my own Prime." I said "I swear I won't attack you."

He looked in my optics searching for something which he must have found for he nodded. Ironhide vented and transformed obviously ready to go.

To say that retrieving the glasses went badly would be an understatement. Not only did Autobot have less patience than a hyper toddler but Mikaela, Sam, and his parents were arrested by some group called Sector 7. Now we were going to ambush their convoy.

I'm really not apart of this plan because they don't trust me not to offline the humans, but that means I get to watch so its ok. Ironhide planted his foot infront of the vehicle and then Prime ripped off the roof. When they got out for whatever reason Sam seemed upset at Mikaela. I walked over as Bumblebee was lubricating on a human.

"Bumblebee stop lubricating on the man." Optimus said

Bee stopped but then Mikaela moved in for her revenge, not sure what he did but ok.

"This is a felony!" He yelled among other threats as he undressed.

That was about when the helicopters showed up. Now all of us were running off to hid. Not exactly hard for me but the rest had some issues. I ended up with Ratchet, who was the only one besides Prime to not treat me like slag. We met Ironhide and Jazz on a bridge in time to see Bumblebee get taken down by the humans.

It took alot of will power to not follow thru with the sudden urge to offline everyone hurting him. But why do I feel so fragging protective of him? I watched as the humans loaded him up on a trailer, I need to go after him but why?

"After who?" Ratchet asked

I didn't realize I had been saying it out loud.

I opted to ignore him as I listened to Ironhide argue with Prime.

"I will not leave my youngling in the servos of the humans!" Ironhide yelled

"We can't get to save Bumblebee without harming the humans." Prime stated

"No, I already lost Shadowfire I won't lose him to!" He growled

Wait what?

My processor kept rapidly replaying his word's over and over. I almost glitched but Ratchet was apperantly watching me.

"Shadow! Don't you dare I do not have time for this." He yelled, pretty much right in my audio receptor.

This may have kept me from glitching but it didn't help my processor ache.

"Ow you grumpy fragger!" He swung a wrench at me but I ducked "It's already damaged no need to make it worse." I said

Of course he was immediately scanning it "No not now." I said walking over to Prime.

"I'm going after Bumblebee." I said, still not completely sure why I was.

"No we-"

I cut him off "I wasn't asking permission Prime, I was telling you." I said before I cloaked, jumped off the bridge transforming and flying after the humans.

Autobot POV

Ironhide stared after Shadow in shock.

"Optimus you can't just let her fly off, she'll kill him!" He yelled

"Actually she can't and won't her femme programing wouldn't allow her to." Ratchet said " I'm more worried about the damage in her processor."

"What! Her processor's damag-"

"More specifically what caused it" Ratchet continued ignoring Ironhide. "The area its resides in couldn't be reached accidentally, and the only things in that area deal with memory's and bonds-"

"Wait I thought bonds only dealt with the spark?" Jazz said

"For the most part yes but that particular area influences the opening and blocking them. If you already knew how it would only be slightly more difficult but if you didn't-"

"It would be impossible." Optimus finished

"No just close to it. For instance both bot's would have to be very… close..." Ratchet trailed off think back to a strange conversation with a certain blue femme.

"As interesting as this may be if we are to reach the cube before the Decepticons we need to leave now." Optimus said subspacing the glasses. "Autobots transform and roll out!" He ordered.

Shadowfire POV

If you've never flown with a processor ache before don't try. Between the adjustments, all the data, and calculations its sucks. On top of all this I had to keep track out a black helicopter at night while trying not to use my scanners, I also had to not be discovered. Though I can baffle my engine's they can still be heard from a bit less than a quarter of a mile away.

Thankfully they reached their destination. I landed and immediately purged, then after recovering I silently made my way near Bumblebee. I wouldn't be able to free him until we were in a more secluded. It broke my spark to see him lay there being sprayed by liquid nitrogen, some of it is femme programming but the rest was something else.

Then when the door finally came into sight I had to maneuver my 26 foot tall, multi-ton frame thru without being detected. I would have jumped for joy when we finally reached a room if it wasn't for the ominous machines all around. I decide to act after they closed the door.

I grabbed the human's using the nitrogen and tossed them semi-gently across the room.

"If you want to live I recommend getting in that corner now." I growled pointing to the corner I had tossed the others into. They quickly obeyed and I formed a dagger and cut Bumblebee loose.

"Come on let go get your human." I said

His response was to flip down his battle mask. I smirked before doing the same. Now where his is yellow with black, mine is a much darker black than my armor leaving only my violet optic's. When I glanced at the humans their fear could probably have been put into jars and sold as weapons.

Not a single human tried to stop us as we went toward where two very faint trail of Bumblebee's signature led. As we entered the room where the Allspark was being kept two bolts of energy shot from it to me and Bumblebee. However instead of making my processor ache disappear it got worst.

The sudden increase in pain caused me to stumble for a sec before I recovered. I'm hoping it's just operating under the premise that it gets worse before it get better. It did not help my patience however. So instead of going to the door of the room that the trails led to I formed a cannon and blasted a hole in the wall.

Luckily (for them anyway) the chunks of concrete missed all of the humans. But one piece hit a strange clear cube revealing a very frightened sparkling. It looked into my optics as I entered the room before it practically teleported to my cheastplate's, chirping and whirling like its life depended on it.

I flipped up my battlemask as programming I didn't even know I had prompted my spark to reach out toward the sparkling, the moment I did I was almost over whelmed by its feelings off fear, anger and desperation, yet it still felt hope despite this. I finally realized I had been cooing at the sparkling and stopped.

I instinctively opened my chestplates and put the sparkling in my hold before closing them. It was only then that I noticed Bumblebee staring either at me or the hole in the wall in apparent shock.

"What I thought I'd try it Ironhide's way." I said innocently before looking at the human's picking themselves up off the ground. It now occurred to me that the-my sparkling had been trapped in the clear box.

"So" I said crouching down "who wants to explain why the sparkling was trapped in a box?" My voice deadly calm.

Bumblebee suddenly appeared infront off me having decided to protect the humans from the fragged off adopted mother of said sparkling.

"Umm what's a sparkling?" Sam asked

I was the only one not surprised when Bumblebee answered

"A sparkling is what you would call a child or baby." He said not taking his optics off me.

"Wait you can talk now?" Sam and Mikaela exclaimed

I vented and walked out of the new door leaving Bumblebee to explain. It was now that I noticed the alarms going off, I thought they were because of me, until I heard a voice saying something about cryo failing. It was now that the humans came spilling out from the room and Bumblebee walked toward the Allspark.

"Anyone want to tell me what's going on?" I asked

Mikaela turned to me "Whatever is keeping Megatron frozen is failing so we're taking the cube and leaving!" She yelled

My spark skipped Megatron was here? in the same facility as the Allspark. Humans are officially fragged and us, pit we're all fragged. I now noticed a pint sized Allspark being held by Bumblebee, and uniformed humans yelling about weapons. Next thing I know I'm behind HIm in a convoy headed toward some place called Mission City.

Don't forget to review.


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: I own only my OC Shadowfire and changes to existing plot.

Breem- 8.3 minutes

Nano-klick- One second

Klick- 1.2 minutes

Joor- 6.5 hours

Solar cycle- One day

Cycle- 1.25 hours

Vorn- 83 years

.:abcd:.- Comm' link

{abcd}- Bond

"abcd"- Cybertronian

abcd- Thought's

Chapter 5

I could think of many places I would rather be, for instance a planet Megatron is not on. Yet here I am behind an Autobot escorting the Allspark into the middle of a human city. It was now that I heard explosions and crashing behind us.

"Decepticon's six-o'clock!" One of the human's yelled

I then caught sight of a painfully familiar police car. Despite the pain that shot thru my spark, I was filled with the urge to cut him into tiny little pieces of slag. The only thing that stopped me was the sparkling siting in my hold/glove box. So instead I focused on following Bumblebee as he sped-up and weaved in and out of traffic.

I stopped behind him when one of the humans ran into a store to get radios. We pulled onto what must have been a main road and stopped on the side.

"I'm going to provide some overwatch, please tell the others." I told Bumblebee before engaging my thruster's flying to the top of a nearby building and cloaked. Thankfully it was able to hold my weight not that I weight that much, you know what weight is relative.

I formed my rifle and started to scan the area, listening to the comm's all the while. The sparkling was sitting content in my hold, which I'm glad for as it's the reason I'm on a roof and not at street level. I watched helplessly as Bumblebee and Ironhide attempted to block Starscream's missiles with a truck.

This blew off the yellow bots ped's but nothing else. Everything went fine after that until Megatron arrived. I watched as all the bots except Jazz retreated. Jazz because he was grabbed by Meg's who then flew up onto a building to my right. My rifle was up on target and fired as soon as Megatron stopped moving.

This made him drop Jazz but also gave away my position. Before I could fully activate my thruster's the roof under me exploded because of a blast from Megatron's fusion cannon. This sent me flying off the building, which wouldn't be so bad if shrapnel hadn't torn apart very important parts of my left thruster.

When I activated my right thruster I was sent cartwheeling into a building on my left, or more specifically thru the building. I came to a stop about 150 meters and five stories' away from the building. I managed to right myself before I hit to better absorb the impact. I screamed when my right leg was snapped completely in half, then I was spun around and skidded on my back thru car's for another 75 meter's.

My sparkling was radiating fear, but to comfort it I would need to either open my chestplate's in battlezone, or open my side of the bond and exposing it to the pain I was feeling. Neither option was viable. My chronometer which was about the only thing not damaged, said I sat there for about 10 minutes before a before a silver Pontiac Solstice pulled up, weaving past over turned car's.

"Damn Shadow da pit happened ta you?" He asked

I managed to point to the building that was now in front of me, sporting a large hole.

"Oh."

I vented which sent a spasm of pain thru my frame, drawing a groan from my vocal processor.

"Please just comm Ratchet." I said while trying to reroute my cooling lines so I didn't overheat.

"K." He said simply

It took me a minute to realize he knew I was the one who had saved him, as he hadn't called me 'Con once. When Ratchet arrived two minutes later he immediately started yelling at me. I just opened my chestplate's and handed him my sparkling before finally succumbing to stasis lock.

Autobot POV

Ratchet stared at the sparkling in his servo for a second before handing it to a very surprised Jazz, and quickly working to repair the badly injured mother infront of him. When Jazz finally snapped out of his shock he was at a lost with what to do with it.

"Ratch just what am I s'posed ta do with a sparkling?" he asked and only received a grunt from the medic.

"Well s'pose it's you 'n me f'now lil'one." He said siting down on a car near Ratchet.

Shadowfire POV

When I onlined I found myself laying on my chest, in what I could only describe as a medbay. Now the last I was checked the Autobot's did not have a base muchless a medbay.

"I know your online femme so you may as well open your optics." A grumpy sounding voice said.

"Ratchet?"

"Who else were you expecting" He said "it is my medbay."

As he was talking I was trying to figure out where the feelings of fear were coming from, then I remembered the sparkling.

"Where is it." I demanded turning over to look at Ratchet.

"She is fine if a little upset with her situation." He said opening a drawer?, pulling her out and placing her on my chest.

"You put my sparkling in a drawer." I growled trying to form my cannon only to find my weapons offline. Oh well I have another option.

I extended my claws and dug them into Ratchet's arm "If you ever put my sparkling in a drawer or even a box ever again I will rip off your armor and pour molten metal on your protoform." I hissed before releasing him and retracting my claws to comfort my sparkling.

Ratchet just vented before launching into and explanation of what had happened. Apperantly we were now in the dam again and it was our temporary base. Megatron was dead and the rest of the Decepticons were scattered. Prime had sent out a message to all Autobots and was hoping they would arrive on earth soon.

Mikaela, Sam, and his family were stuck in the dam with us until the government sorted out the situation. All of this happened in the two weeks the fragging medic kept me in stasis. At least he's allowing me to walk because I have no desire to be stuck in this infernal medbay. After he gave me a pain killer for my processor ache and I promised to come back if it got worse he let me leave.

I walked out of the room thinking about my choices. I couldn't just run off any more because I had my sparkling to think of, yet there is no way I can join the Autobots either. Granted most of them don't hate me anymore but they don't exactly trust me either.

"I really should give you a name." I said looking at the little femme. She chirped looking back with her sapphire blue optics. She had already grown a bit, weather because of the Allspark or if it was normal I didn't know. I can't believe the Allspark was destroyed, the last hope of our planet gone, used to kill Megatron.

I sighed before getting back to naming my sparkling, who was currently sitting in my servo I walked thru the halls.

"Ok how about Nightflare?" I asked no response

"Shadowflare?" ditto

"Moonshadow? Nightwave?" She just stared at me with her beautiful blue optics. I smiled as another idea came to me.

"Sapphire?" I asked

The little femme seemed to think for a second before giving a happy trill.

"Well I'm glad you like it." I said with a small smile.

Funny never thought I would end up a mother. Sapphire was spoiled, then again what do you expect when you mix a femmeling with bot's who haven't seen a sparkling in vorns.

A month later when I was finally considered recovered enough I was allowed to leave the base. I think Ratchet was glad of this, because in response to his constant badgering of me I annoyed him back. I was just happy to be able to fly again. I left Sapphire with Bumblebee because technically I was doing a patrol, despite there being little 'Con activity it's not something I want her along for.

And no I haven't joined the Autobots, I'm kind of my own faction but am allied with the 'Bot's. I took off and headed off in a circle that would take me over the old Decepticon base. As I flew over it halfway thru my patrol my scanner's found a very familiar spark signature.

.:Prime I'm checking out activity at the old 'Con base.:. I said as I dove down still cloaked.

.:Shadow I don't-:.

.:I've said it twice now I'm not asking permission I'm telling you:. I said cutting the comm.

I transformed and landed infront of the entrance. I formed my sword and staying cloaked I drew it from my back while moving into the base toward the spark sig. I walked up behind the mech and placed the tip of my blade on his back.

"Imagine seeing you here." I said flipping my battlemask down.

"Shadowfire I'm-."

I pressed the point further into his back silencing him.

"No I'm not letting talk your way out of this you fragger, I trusted you once and you betrayed me."

"Look I know you're still mad-"

"I'm not mad, I'm fragged off." I growled

"'Fire-"

"Don't! You lost the right to call me that 'Con."

Barricade stood still for a moment then he vented. "You can't think I'll just let you offline me, I will fight you."

I gave a sad smile behind my mask. "I wouldn't expect any less."

I stood back and prepared for one of my hardest battles yet. Because of our vorns as partners… and more Barricade knows my tactics and how I think. I in return know everything about him as well, at least I thought I did.

I stepped back as he spun around his flail out, I waited for him to swing where he thought I was before I struck. As his flail passed me I slashed at the chain with my sword, severing it in half and sending the head into a nearby wall.

By the time his cannon blast was fired I had already moved rolling out of the way-right into an emp burst that offlined my cloaking and some sensors.

"I really should have expected that." I said before avoiding another blast by diving behind a wall only for another to go through the wall and hit my leg. I checked my camo but it was still rebooting and so no help.

Now even more fragged off I formed both daggers and rolled out throwing both in his direction before another round caught me in the chassis sending me to the ground. I staggered up and saw to my satisfaction that both daggers had hit, one to the right of his spark and the other in his cannon.

I formed my sword as I walked toward him, watching as he tried to stand. When his other servo went for his pistol I lopped it off before spinning and delivering a deep blow across his chest.

I stood there for a moment sword extended, after a nano-klick I looked down at him and felt a pang in my spark as I moved my blade to his chestplates. I don't know how long I stood over him fighting with myself until I finally moved away with a quick vent.

_I can't do it, I just can't._

As I stepped back I locked optics with him for an astro second before I had to look away. I took a last look around and was about to leave when my optics landed on his flail, I don't know what prompted me to but I walked over to the wall it was stuck in and tore it out though it took a few tries because of the damage I took.

I tucked it into my subspace as I walked out with only one last look toward 'Cade.

"I'm sorry." I whispered my head bowed before I jumped into the sky and took off like nothing happened.

As I walked out of the base I checked my chest and grimaced knowing I would have to see Ratchet. When I reached the base I cloaked as I didn't want to flip-up my mask until I could wipe it off but didn't need everyone to see me in my current energon covered state either.

When I reached Ratchets domain I uncloaked.

"Don't suppose you have any rags do you I asked?" In what I hope was an innocent voice.

"Sweet Primus femme what did you do!" Ratchet exclaimed. This unfortunately caused every human nearby to look into the room. I glanced at them only to see most blanch but all run off.

"Is it really that bad?" I asked with a sigh

"What happened." he demanded wiping away energon for my wound.

"Barricade learned a very important lesson that human's discovered long ago." I said

"And what might that be?" Ratchet asked dryly

"The pit hath no fury like a femme scorned."

The next year passed pretty uneventfully. Just patrol's, moving to the new base in Diego Garcia, and Sapphire growing even more. She is now about nine feet tall, Ratchet thinks it's because of the Allspark but we'll never know. She even got a new alt-mode a Kawasaki ninja 650r the same black and darker orange of her armor. Sapphire has caused more than her fair share of trouble and is technically a youngling now, again Allspark.

The next big event was when Prime told us there was one shard of the Allspark left. Everyone was surprised but beyond that there wasn't much to it. I would say that the first arrivals were a big deal to but I think we all would have rather they didn't. Primus their "gangster" speech in so annoying.

On top of that I've been having the weirdest dream's. Every single one has had two bots that look like younger versions of Ironhide and Chromia as well as a yellow sparkling. They all have this sense of familiarity to them but I don't remember them. And on top of that my processor aches have been getting worse, I'm going to have to talk to Ratchet when we get back because this is gotten ridiculous.

And now here I am flying with or rather next to a plane carrying Ironhide and Sapphire to meet the newest arrival's. I'm not sure how 'Phire talked Prime into letting here come but I guess he thought it would be a good idea. I was doing fine until a voice suddenly burst into my processor.

{WHAT THE PIT WERE YOU THINKING?} Chromia yelled

I immediately closed the bond trying to regain the altitude I had lost, before sending back exactly how much pain that had caused my processor. It was a few seconds later that I felt a more tentative prodding from her.

{I'm still mad at you.} She said

{Mom? What's wrong?} Sapphire asked.

Slag she would pick up on that.

{It's nothing sweetspark, just a processor ache.} I responded hoping she would accept that.

I could feel her suspicion thru the bond but she didn't say anything.

{Shadow?} Chromia asked

{Yea I know still mad, so your one of the new arrivals?} I asked.

{What gave it away?}

{Ha ha so what did Prime tell you about who's coming?} I asked

{That we would be glad to see two of you and not to kill the third.} She said dead serious

{Really? That's what he said} I dead panned.

{Yup. So I'm guessing you're the third bot.} Chromia cheerfully

{Can you at least tell me who I'm going to be attacked by?} I asked

{Nope, where's the fun in that?} She asked

{I hate you.} I growled

She just snickered and closed the bond. Glitch

We arrived at the coordinate's to find we had arrived first.

I was a bit... apprehensive about what was going to happen.

"So when do they land?" I asked Ironhide

"Five."

That's it? Minutes? Hour's? Just a little more specific would be nice. Sapphire meanwhile was bouncing off the metaphorical walls.

"Hide when do they get here?" She asked her voice oozing excitement.

"They should only be five minutes Sapphire." He said

Really? So is it just me he won't answer or will he only answer her?

Frag. My. Life.

When the "comets" came into sight I noticed there was four. So... hopefully only three will attack me and considering Chroma's sisters are always with her that's at least two. They landed shaking the ground and throwing up dust. I moved away from 'Phire so she wouldn't be caught in the crossfire.

The dust cleared to show four femme's, three smaller femme's and one probably about my size. All but one showed happiness when they looked at Ironhide, I'm assuming Chromia was the one staring at him lustfully. They all just about melted when they saw Sapphire, who looked at me with bright happy optic's more than happy to have more bots spoil her.

Unfortunately they followed her gaze to me and any kindness was gone from two of the bots optics. the larger bot's and Chroma's showed confusion but that's all I had time to see before I had to form my sword and block Arcee's? blade's while the other tried to stab me with a dagger. As I was doing so I completely missed Ironhide and Chromia staring shocked at my blade.

I split it so I was now holding a blade in each servo looking between Arcee and Flare-up. I blocked Arcee's sudden attack with one blade, while smacking her upside the head with the flat of the other. Then dodging a slash from Flare-up's dagger, then I simultaneously hit her helm with a hilt and swept her feet from under her. They froze when I held a blade to each of their throats.

"So now that you know I could offline you but didn't, leave me the frag alone." I said rejoining the blades and sheathing it.

I turned around to find both Ironhide and Chromia on the ground in stasis. What the frag could have happened to glitch both trigger happy warrior's at the same time? I don't think I've ever heard of either of them glitching. The third femme was trying to get Chromia online while Sapphire did the same with Ironhide.

"Umm what happened" I asked helm tilted sideways

{What happened sweetspark?} I asked Sapphire

{I don't know I wasn't watching them mom.} She said sounding slightly panicked. I sent peace and comfort over the bond trying to calm her down. She started to calm a little but she still felt like it was her fault somehow.

"Sweetspark it's not your fault." I said pulling her into a hug "They'll be fine." I just held her for about a minute caressing her helm until she'd finally accepted it. It was now that Ironhide started to online and he didn't seem happy at all. He looked around until he saw me and must have decided it was attack Shadow day.

I pushed Sapphire out of the way before I was picked up and thrown back into the ground, my arms pined and a cannon in my face.

"What is it now?" I asked more than done with being attacked.

However instead of answering me he reached down grabbing a wing tip with his free hand and slowly bent it inward. I couldn't even scream instead I closed my bond with Sapphire as my back arched off of the ground. He finally stopped but didn't let go of it, this allowed my air intakes to start working again.

"That is how it felt to see that sword in your servo's." He said

"You have one chance to let go of my wing." I half growled flipping down my mask and forming my dagger's.

When he didn't I rammed my knee into his cod plate which was enough to get my arm's free. I then barley registering yelling in the background I stabbed a dagger in his knee and went to do the same for his elbow until a searing pain shot thru my fuel tanks.

{Mom!} I heard Sapphire yell both aloud and not. I looked down to see a decent sized hole in my abdominal plating before I collapsed on to my back, coughing up energon. Even through our mostly closed bond I could feel Sapphire's distress and fear. I don't know why it felt so familiar or why who was hovering over me kept switching between a large seeker and Sapphire. I slipped into stasis when a veritable flood of memory's burst into my processor.

Autobot POV

When Chromia onlined her first thoughts were about the sword. Where did she get that sword? She thought before opening her optic's and siting up to see Arcee aiming her cannon at... Shadow!

"Arcee-" She started only to be cut off by her cannon firing, a blast off plasma going straight thru the lower part of Shadow's back. Chromia felt the femme's shock and pain thru their bond as she slowly fell sideways off of Ironhide and onto her back. Elita had been moving to intervene but now turned back looking at Arcee who had a satisfied look on her face.

Arcee's look change to shock when the black and orange youngling sprinted toward the tall black femme yelling mom.

"What the frag just happened." Chromia asked angry and confused.

"It doesn't matter, if she's even going to have a chance we need to get back to base now." Elita said as she looked at the damaged femme before trying to pick up Shadow but the youngling was in the way.

"Chromia can you please-"

"Yea I know." She said grabbing the youngling semi-gently and pulling her away.

"Come on sweetspark she'll be fine." Chromia said not sure whether she was comforting the youngling or herself.

They made it to the plane with Ironhide driving on last. Elita began using what little medical knowledge she had trying to at least stop the leaking energon. Chromia was trying to calm down the youngling with marginal success. Elita commed Ratchet hoping to get at least some help as well as make sure he would be ready when they arrived.

To say the least it was a bit of a hectic flight would be an understatement. When she had finally calmed down enough Sapphire had taken to glaring at Arcee and continued to do so the rest of the flight. Chromia was finally able to find out what had happened from Flare-up and was not at all happy with her mate or Arcee.

When they finally landed Ratchet rushed onto the plane picked up Shadow and instructed Elita to follow him, before running off to the medbay. A still upset yet very angry Sapphire walked off with Jazz leaving Optimus, Ironhide, Chromia and her sister's to explain what had happened.

Optimus felt that he was responsible for the whole thing. All of them tried to tell him otherwise but knew only Elita would be able to get him to listen. After the debriefing Chromia went after Ironhide for unnecessarily attacking Shadow, and then Arcee for shooting Shadow in the back for defending herself, before making her way over to the medbay.

Ratchet worked for hours first stabilizing Shadow and then repairing the damage. A week later he wasn't sure why she wouldn't come out of stasis. All he could say was she was fully repaired and would online when she did.

Shadowfire POV

I was confused. Not just slightly, but completely and utterly confused. I can't just ask anyone bot or otherwise for help either. When I had onlined Ratchet told me I had been in stasis for a week and a half. I wasn't sure how to treat anyone anymore, they still though of me as Shadow the ex-'Con, I haven't found a way to tell them otherwise.

I mean really I can't just pop up and go "Hi I'm actually Shadowfire who you think is dead but I was really just captured by 'Cons and had all my memories suppressed." Hmpf. Even if they believed me now they'd just think about everything I did as a 'Con. Frag that's all I can think about, I'm fragging disgusted at myself. It's just better to let them remember me as I was.

But it does explain alot like my bond with Chromia my mom, it feels so weird yet so right to say that. That and the processor ache I've had for more than a year. I can even feel my bond with both my aunts, dad and brother. Not that I've touched them at all that would defeat the purpose of hiding the truth.

Yet I need to tell someone the truth I'll go insane if I don't, pit even if I do I still might go insane. Sapphire'll probably pester me until I tell her she knows something's bothering me, but she probably thinks it has to do with Arcee. Frag I don't even know where to begin with that. I stabbed my dad in the knee and then my aunt shot me in the back, I'm about to have a slaggin' mental breakdown.

I might just offline from stress alone. Somehow about a week after I had onlined I ended up telling Ratchet during a checkup. He wasn't actually that surprised, apperantly he was just waiting for something jumpstart my memories. Then one that did it was ironically the last one I had in the youth sector's attack.

He agreed not to tell anyone unless he felt it was necessary, anyone else and I might worry but I know(now anyway) Ratchet is thinking about this from a medical point of view. But considering how the past few days are going it might be sooner than I thought.

And now I'm stuck helping my dad(how long before I slip up?) train with the new N.E.S.T recruits. It was basically a giant game of paintball with the recruits trying to "offline" the "Con", yea guess who that was. This is what I get for asking to join the Autobot's, amazingly enough Optimus actually let me join. But that means being the 'Con in training at least this time anyway.

I looked at the little gun that was the only weapon I could use.

"So this is it? Not even a second one? I mean you do realize the 'Cons using anything this small are very few and far between right?" I asked Dad/Ironhide

"It's an exercise and their recruits deal with it." He said

Yup feel'n the love already. "Any rules beside that." I asked sarcastically

"Don't kill or maim them"

"Yes, I would have never thought of those."

"Being a 'Con I suppose you wouldn't."

"I am not a fragging 'Con get that thru your thick helm, if I was every single one of you would be dead. It wouldn't even be a challenge you slagger." I growled.

He just gave me an unconcerned look before telling the new recruits their objective. Oh fine I'll deal with you after I I'm done with the recruits, fragger's can't shoot what they can't see.


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: I own only my OC Shadowfire and changes to existing plot.

Warning: If you don't like sexual content then skip the section marked like below. The end will be similarly marked.

*Start*

Breem- 8.3 minutes

Nano-klick- One second

Klick- 1.2 minutes

Joor- 6.5 hours

Solar cycle- One day

Cycle- 1.25 hours

Vorn- 83 years

.:abcd:.- Comm' link

{abcd}- Bond

"abcd"- Cybertronian

abcd- Thought's

Chapter 6

He really shouldn't have allowed me to cloak. As soon as the horn was blown I cloaked silently moving around the edge of the field, flanking the confused soldier's. Taking a last look at the absolutely pathetic weapon I had been given I fired taking out four of the 24 recruits in one strike. I moved firing again when they turned to where I had been.

Just for effect I ducked behind a building uncloaked and stepped out firing battle mask down. Before they responded I ducked back again and cloaked before setting up as ten of them rounded the corner I waited a sec before firing. I hit most but two got away until I jumped around the corner taking them down as well.

Between their cursing and complaint's I got the feeling they didn't like me. Then I came up with an amazing idea, my holoform. Not only will they not understand why a woman is shooting at them but it allows me twice the fire power. Activating it I had it/me pick up a gun then move off into position for another ambush.

When they came into view moving cautiously I decide to listen for a nano-klick.

"Who the hell is this? We've been training with that big fucker for weeks and we were doing fine, then they throw this at us?"

"I know we can't even see him on thermals."

He? Why you sexist fragger. Deciding it was time to end it me and my holoform opened up on them. Only a few were able to fire at all and they missed. The horn blew again so I deactivated my holoform and uncloaked, watching as they stared shocked at me appearing right in front of them.

"Don't ever judge your opponent by their gender." I said with a slight edge to my voice before standing up and walking past a shocked Lennox and Epps, who were watching from next to my dad.

"I'm going on a flight, please try to avoid any friendly fire." I said sarcastically

"Don't temp me 'Con." Dad said

I held back a sob as I jumped up transforming midair and blasted off over the ocean. I flew around for about two hours before I landed in front of the firing range. I formed my rifle then grabbed it from my back and indisriminatlly firing at targets.

I'm not sure if I was fragged off, depressed, or both. I eventually settled on depressed and just sat down hugging my knees to my chest plates, optic's staring at the ground. No bot but Ratchet knows about who I am, and if I told them they'd just hate me even more. Why do I even try? No matter what I loose... well except one.

I formed my daggers and stared at them for a second before dropping them to the ground. Forming my sword I drew it watching the purple fire dance and glow along the blade. I've taken so many lives' with it what's one more. None of them need me, not even Sapphire she's already able to take care of herself. She was barely a sparkling for any time at all.

This is better anyway it'll only hurt for a little while, she'll survive, I did. Besides all the bots love her and I know at least mom would take care of her, in fact she's better off without me anyway.

"Shadow?"

I didn't bother answering.

"Shadow what are you doing here?" My mom asked now in front of me.

"I'd ask if you've ever had a secret you couldn't tell anyone but I know you do." I said ignoring her question.

"Fine, then tell me how you got that sword."

I let out a humorless chuckle. " You wouldn't believe me if I told you, or you would and hate me... that's why I have to do this."

"Shadow what the frag are you talking about? Just tell me, you know you can tell me anything." She demanded/pleaded probably because she didn't like how I was staring at my sword.

"Fine" I said resigned "you want to know what going on, I got my memories back."

She was quiet for a moment "Shadow that gre-"

"No it's not great, I hate myself the things I've done, and I'm sure my family would to." I said "So tell me Chromia what would you do if your daughter had lost her memories and joined the 'Cons? What if she had done terrible things as a 'Con?"

Once she got over her surprise my mom thought for a minute.

"If I found out my daughter was alive then 'Con or not I would do everything I could to find her no matter what she had done."

"But would you still love her? Despite everything that she did?"

My mom sighed "Shadow you didn't know any better I'm sure your family would forgive you, just as I would my daughter."

My spark stopped, I couldn't believe what she had said sure she still didn't know but maybe there's a chance.

"I don't know, my dad really hates 'Cons."

She vented sharply.

"Ok, so you want to know how I got this sword." I asked looking at mom questioningly, when she nodded I continued.

"It was given to me by someone very close to me the day my family thinks I died, the day I lost my memories."

"Who gave it to you?" Mom asked. She probably thinks I just knew her daughter.

"My dad gave to me as a gift to celebrate my last day as a youngling." I said looking intently at my mom.

I watched her start connecting the dots between everything I said.

"I should have died in the youth sector, it would have been easier. But apparently I put up enough of a fight to be worth capturing for their use."

By this time Chromia was staring at me optics wide shock, confusion, and joy coming over our bond.

"Shadowfire?" She asked cautiously, reminding me of when we first talked again over our bond.

"Yea mom it's me." I said, only to be pulled into a hug.

I was surprised usually I would have to hug her, even before my "death". This was interrupted by a sudden flare of anger from my mom, and I flinched. I knew I shouldn't have tried, it was just selfish an-

"Shadowfire, sweetspark I'm not mad at you" she said holding me even tighter "I'm mad at the fraggin 'Cons who took you away."

"You don't hate me?" I asked needing to hear her say it.

She looked into my optics before answering. "No I don't hate you 'Fire I could never hate you." Purposely not using Shadow to make her point.

It was now that another thought struck me. "Uh mom I would really appreciate if you didn't tell Ratchet about this."

"Why not? You were about to offline yourself!"

"That was because I was shot by my aunt, stabbed my dad in the knee and then had no one to talk to for two months. Now I have you."

She thought about this for a second before nodding her helm. Then she suddenly smacked the side of my helm.

"Ow the frag was that for!" I exclaimed glaring at her.

"Don't you ever do that again!" She yelled smacking me again "or I swear to Primus I will bring you back just to beat the slag out of you!"

Aannnd mother-daughter bonding moment over. Eh it was good while it lasted.

I don't know how Ratchet found out, I swear he knows everything. Thankfully he didn't tell everyone. He did however smack me upside the head with a wrench, and threaten to slag me after Chromia was done. Primus is nothing a secret from him?

Oh speaking of mom I don't know if anyone but Ratchet and I have noticed the difference in her mood. They probably have but haven't said anything, not that they'd tell me about it anyway. Well Sapphire would, but she's likely to busy training to notice. Yes training I don't like it but I know it's necessary, plus she's being trained by my mom and her sisters so she'll be fine.

I however have been sent again to greet more new arrivals. I had laughed when Optimus first told me, after last time I thought he was joking. Nope he just thinks it better to get it over asap. At least he and Ratchet are here this time so I probably won't offline... I hope.

I was standing as close to Optimus as I could without being awkward, which meant just far enough for Elita not to think I was trying to replace her. These was judged over about five minutes of me slowly moving closer to them, watching her frame tense and relax 'til I was close enough to be safe but not have her looking at me suspiciously.

While she doesn't hate me she doesn't quite trust me either. I think she knows I'm hiding something, which I am but just not what she thinks. Any further musings were put to a halt by the landing of four bots. Is there some rule they have to travel in fours or just coincidence?

I watched as the pods changed into three mechs and a femme. Two of the mechs were also very much alike... no it can't be I refuse to believe Primus hates me that much. As the thought passed thru my processor they started wrestling with each other arguing about Primus knows what. The femme and other mech just watched obviously used to this, poor bots.

This went on for about a minute until they noticed Optimus, Elita, and... me.

"What the frag is she doing here?" Sunstreaker? growled while Sideswipe? just look curious and confused. The other mech had walked over to Ratchet and was now talking with him, while Elita had moved toward the femme who was apparently a friend.

"Shadow has been an Autobot for almost a year now and has given her word not to betray us." Optimus said

"Yes because the word of a decepticon can always be trusted." Sunny said

"You do realize how stupid you sound right?" I asked "Obviously mine has been trusted and the fact they are here to greet you Proves it can be."

"Oh and how is that proof?"

"Considering what my job was I'd call it very definitive proof, or have you already forgotten?"

"Shadow-"

"No Prime he obviously needs a friendly reminder of what I can do. I know he wants to he's been flexing both servos the entire time." I said " besides we may as well get it over with, wasn't that your reason for bringing me?"

He vented knowing it was inevitable. "Please try not to create too much work for Ratchet." He said before moving away, well at least he acknowledges my skills

Sideswipe looked like he was trying to talk 'Streaker out of the idea with no success.

"I'll try not to damage her to bad." Sunny said confidently

I just shook my helm before moving forward and waiting for him to make a fool of himself. He drew both his swords before standing there waiting for something. "Aren't you going to arm yourself or have you already given up?"

I pretended to be surprised "Oh I wasn't aware I needed to it didn't seem fair to you." Causing all the new arrivals to look at me like I grew another helm. The others have seen me train and are very well aware of my skills.

"Your loss." 'Streaker said before attacking.

I waited until he swung at me before dodging his strike, tripping him and then cloaking as he fell. His expression was quite comical when he rose only find me nowhere in sight. I would have toyed with him bit I knew Optimus didn't like it when I did, so I waited until his back was to me before tripping him again and stabbing a dagger thru both his legs and activating its barb. (I had replaced my daggers a while ago and picked up these. They were the most humane pair I could get with the 'Cons, I don't usually use the barbs but this it's better than offlining him.)

I moved away from him then, waiting for a moment before forming my cannon and firing a blast just far enough from his head to not cause damage.

"So now that's done can we get back to base?" I asked uncloaking next to Optimus, while the other femme and mech stared at me in shock.

The other two arrivals were named Jolt and Moonracer, Jolt being blue and Moonracer being green. I learned from my mom that she likes Ratchet... I didn't really think that was possible. Anyway 'Streaker isn't being as much of a glitch now which is perfectly fine with me.

Sideswipe on the other servo won't leave me the frag alone. I thought he would at least be a little angry with me about his brother but apparently not. I think I may have been right about the wing fetish. To top it off I have to go on a mission with the fragger. He better not touch my wings or I'll be coming back alone.

My life sucks. It's something I've known for a while, but now it's being driven home. Viciously.

"Come on Shadow it's no fun talking to myself." The red bot said cheerfully

If he ever shuts up we might actually finish this recon mission before I offline from old age. Consider how long that would take you can imagine my frustration. As we were walking into a small pond I finally had enough.

"Shut the frag up and concentrate you glitch!" I hissed at him. He finally muted his vocals but it was already too late, as I noticed a seemingly inconspicuous cable leading into the pond. Before I could so much as utter a curse a massive jolt of electricity seared thru my frame sending me into stasis.

The first thing I noticed when I onlined was the pain coming from my processor. According to the diagnostic I ran someone had forcefully uploaded a large packet of something. I wasn't sure I wanted to know what it contained.

"I know your online 'Fire."

I froze. I have to be dreaming there's no other way. I turned my helm to the right to see a very familiar mech.

"As flattered as I am that you would dream about me it's not. This is very real, but if you don't believe me..." He trailed off while picking up a remote of some sort. I was distracted by a sudden pain that shot thru me. As I lay gasping in the aftermath I was overcome by a powerful feeling of pleasure. As sudden as it came it disappeared leaving me to attempt to collect myself.

"What did you do." I demanded confused, angry, and a little scared by the feeling.

"I thought it was only fair that I get my revenge for you trying to kill me." Barricade drawled his voice accompanied by another unwanted wave of pleasure.

"Then torture and kill me let's just get this over with." I growled trying not to show how unnerved I was by these feelings.

"As fun as that sounds I thought of something better, and with the help of a comrade I came up with this. As you tried to take my life for using you before, I'm going to do the same only this time without the annoying charade. I'm sure you noticed the data that my comrade added to your processor, I believe he's worked on you before." He said " Well that gives me complete control over your emotions and all of your sensors, not to mention a few programs they added."

"What?" I exclaimed not really able to believe or process everything he just said. Before I could do much else I felt myself quickly calming down against my will.

"No need to get all riled up, now let me tell you what it does. You weren't reprogramed, rather I can activate and deactivate the programing with this" He said holding up the remote "and when it activates it overrides your true programing and memories, and the added one's become your new ones. But when deactivated it allows the "true" you to comeback leaving memories of what you did. Basically when it's active you will believe that you are and always have been nothing more than a pleasure bot." He was grinning when he finished, not that I really noticed as I went from angry, to afraid, to terrified.

If I could at least fight back I might have a chance but if it works like he described, it'll be worse that the last time because I truly will be nothing but an interface outlet for him. Worse I'll have no choice but to enjoy it not that I'd know it at the time. I was pulled from my panic when he spoke again.

"Well I see no reason to wait so let's start, and I'd tell you to just enjoy it but I know you will." He said before my world went black.

*Start*

I onlined overloading from a mech's rod in my port. I onlined my optic's to see my master looking down at me with a smug grin. I moaned as he started to thrust faster into me, my optics dimming from pleasure when he played with my wing. Just when I was going to overload again he stopped making me groan. He laughed before quickly continuing over loading at the same time as me.

"Thank you master." I said happy to have pleased him. I was confused when he laughed getting off of me, pulling out a remote and pressing a button before closing the door and leaving. Suddenly all of my memories came rushing back. The feelings from my port now made me feel disgusted instead of content.

The first thing I did was purge everything in my tanks, and even after they were empty I just dry heaved. I wasn't capable of being angry at the moment. I just cried. I felt dirty and used, like I did before but worse so much worse. I eventually just fell into recharge, exhausted for reason's I didn't want to think about.

*End*

This was the theme for the next month whenever I wasn't controlled by that programing I now hated and feared. For a month I was fragged by Barricade and the other's loving every second. Then feeling disgusted, depressed, and angry after I could remember. Eventually I couldn't even feel angry. After that month I just didn't-couldn't care anymore.

After Barricade got bored and just let Scalpel have me. What sanity I had left was torn away piece by piece from the constant pain caused by the spider like bot. After a week my emotion core crashed needing parts they wouldn't waste on me, leaving me unable to feel anything, anger, sadness, fear, and hope were all beyond my capabilities. Scalpel didn't care as long as I could still feel pain.

I found Sideswipe when I was tossed into his cell after another session with Scalpel.

"Shadow?" He said surprised

I didn't answer because I was in too much pain and wasn't able to care enough to try an answer. I wasn't even thankful when he propped me against the wall.

"Thank you" I said out of habit.

"Could you at least pretend to mean it?" He said jokingly

"No." This threw him for a loop.

"Why not?"

"My emotion core is offline and needs to be repaired." I stated

Sideswipe's optic's dimmed before he slowly sat down next to me and just held me. "I don't care if you can't appreciate this now you will later." He said

My logic core saw the truth in this so I let him, slipping into recharge in his arms feeling safe. This turned into our routine when ever I was brought back to our cell over the next week and a half. After that time Barricade decide to give us back to the Autobots, more to see their reactions than anything. That and Scalpel was bored now that I couldn't scream.

They gave Sideswipe my armor to put in his subspace and then headed for the meeting point. I had to be carried there because I couldn't walk. When we arrived I saw Optimus, Chromia and her sisters, Ratchet, and Sunstreaker standing there waiting. If I could have I would have probably felt joy or at least relief but I couldn't.

The 'Con carrying me just tossed me to the ground glad to be rid of me. I couldn't find a reason to get up so I stayed there. That prompted my mom to check thru our bond, and unable to find a logical reason not to I opened my end. I felt her shock and anger at my complete lack of emotions. I'm sure it showed on her face to but I didn't look.

"What did you do to her?" She asked anger clear in her voice.

"Nothing she didn't enjoy... not that she had a choice." Barricade answered. "Now we'll be leaving you to your happy reunion, for you anyway." I heard the sound of engines as they drove off leaving me and Sideswipe.

I felt myself being turned over and saw it was Chromia and Ratchet. Ratchet started scanning me while mom just hovered over me protectively. "Fragging glitch-headed slagger's!" Ratchet exclaimed

This caused my mom to turn to him with an expression that demanded an explanation. "What did they do to her?" She asked her voice dangerously calm.

"It's more like what didn't they do." He growled swearing again. "Her Emotion core is offline, her vocal processor is offline, the same with most of her pain sensors, not to mention the ridiculous amount of virus's she has. Frag she should probably be offline now, and when she can feel anything I'll be amazed if she doesn't offline herself."

"She won-"

"Chromia one impossible threat is not going to deter her at this point. Judging by the programing I just deleted and Barricade's answer she was literally nothing more than a pleasure bot when it was activated." He said grimly "She wasn't just raped but she enjoyed-maybe even loved it until the programing deactivated. I can't imagine how extreme her emotions were to completely short out her emotion core. Then on top of that she looks to have been tortured until her vocal box shorted out from her screaming."

My mom looked like she was about to chase down the 'Cons and slowly offline every single one.

"I'm putting Shadowfire into medical stasis until I've repaired her processor and cleaned out the viruses." Ratchet said as I felt my systems start to shutdown. "I'll be right there when you online sweetspark I promise." Chromia said her optics twin whirlpool's of emotion. Then my sight faded to black as I went offline.


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: I own only my OC Shadowfire and changes to existing plot.

Breem- 8.3 minutes

Nano-klick- One second

Klick- 1.2 minutes

Joor- 6.5 hours

Solar cycle- One day

Cycle- 1.25 hours

Vorn- 83 years

.:abcd:.- Comm' link

{abcd}- Bond

"_abcd_"- Cybertronian

_abcd_- Thought's

Chapter 8

The first thing I heard was voices. "When is she going to online?"

"She'll online when she's does not before, now stop bothering me I have other work I need to do until then."

_Who are they talking about?_ I thought trying to remember, only to wish I hadn't. A flood of memories rushed thru my processor. As they did so many emotions passed thru me, anger, sadness, disgust, and fear so much fear. I leaned over the edge of the berth purging what little I had in my tanks. When a something touched me I jerked away falling off of the berth, my spark going a mile a minute. I don't know why I did, it wasn't even a conscious decision it just happened.

I looked up to see Chromia standing next to the berth servo still out stretched. She was staring at me shocked. Not that I processed that, in my current state she was an unknown and therefore a possible threat.

"Shadowfire?" She said softly, slowly moving around the berth. My optics followed her every move and no matter what I couldn't stop, I know she won't hurt me but logic isn't exactly something I'm using right now. I felt my claws extending as she came closer. I tried to ignore the urge to strike at her with them but my fear overrode that too. I didn't hit her but she stopped anyway, her optics dimming a little.

{Sweetspark I'm not going to hurt you.} She said over our bond reaching out slowly. She stopped again when she felt the already rampant fear that was raging through me quickly rising. "What did they do to you?" she asked softly, more to herself than me. I didn't answer as all my attention was focused on her servos.

"I'm trying so would you mute it." She said annoyed.

If I was thinking clearly I might have wondered who she was talking to, but I thought she was talking to me and I knew that tone meant pain. I probably would have attacked her then if Sideswipe hadn't walked in. "Hey doc' I'm he-" only to stop when he saw me and Chromia.

"I wouldn't move well then again you'd probably like claw marks so go ahead." He said

"Oh and what d-"

"He's right Chromia and if you were paying attention you would see that." Ratchet said "And I said calm her down not corner her, I told you she won't be thinking straight right now."

My optics were trying to decide who to watch and settled for watching the other two in my peripherals. I was only worried about one anyway I saw the red one as a safe place not a threat, so I only had to watch the small blue one and the greenish one.

"And what do you suppose I do then?" She asked angrily, only setting me on edge.

"Hope she still remembers me of me." Red said as he slowly moved toward me. The voice was now sending comfort which was helping but I couldn't relax with the blue bot so close.

"Chromia I know you want to help but you need to back away from Shadow or she's not going to relax." Red said

"And how do you know that?" She demanded

The red bot was now closer than blue. "Because she hasn't taken her optics off of you and I'm closer to her."

She looked back and forth between me and red before sighing and moving away, slowing at first when I tensed. When I deemed she was far enough away I slumped onto red, giving into the calming feelings. It took a good 15 minutes for my fear to subside enough to think, and then I ended up breaking down crying from shame. Shame of how I had just acted, shame from taking pleasure in the rape, shame for giving up.

Even then red-no Sideswipe just held me comforting me like I was an upset sparkling. If It wasn't for the safe feeling he evoked I might have hated him for it, but I couldn't hate him and that made just made it even worse. It was an extremely annoying that I couldn't even stay mad at him, which only made me more depressed because I _needed_ him. It was a vicious cycle that I was stuck in for a while.

I for one would be perfectly happy to never cry again. It was so fragging annoying and there was nothing I could do to stop. At least until I noticed I still didn't have my armor on. I froze at that realization and almost started crying for embarrassment. Slag my emotions are so messed up.

I searched for my bond with my mom. {Is there a reason why I'm still in my protoform?} I managed to ask shrinking closer(if possible) to Sideswipe.

{You've been clinging to 'Sides for 30 minutes, we thought it would be easier and better to wait.} She said relief flowing from her. Probably because I was speaking to her.

Oh that makes sense now. {So I would need to let him go?} I asked unable to stop the twinge of reluctance and fear.

{You don't want to?}

{I...No but.. I'm not sure why, I mean I barely liked him before and yet now I-I _need_ him. Why?} I said confused

{So you're embarrassed that we can see your protoform, but your fine with being held against Sideswipe?}

{...yes?-I mean-well... I don't know.} My frame and spark saying one thing, my processor another. I vented sharply, not sure what I wanted to do.

{You should at least go to the wash racks. I don't think you noticed but you're filthy.} She said

I looked down at myself and was shocked to say the least. Yes my protoform has never been nor will it ever be shiny or bright. But it wasn't even its normal dark gray, it was covered with dirt, energon, and-. My tanks lurched but I managed keep myself from purging, except that made me notice feelings in my port from the dried lubricants and transfluid. I did purge then, only to continue when I noticed the pink fluid mixed in with the blue energon. That was from the 'Cons final good bye. Even after my tanks were empty I was stuck giving painful dry heaves.

I only stopped after Ratchet injected me with a mild sedative, but by then I was already crying again. I felt so filthy but I didn't have the strength to get to the wash racks. It was only then that I noticed the waves of comfort my mom was sending and that she was stroking my wings, whispering comforting words over and over. I only realized we were in the wash racks when the water and solvents first hit my protoform.

I hadn't realized I was that out of it. While mom washed me gently(well gently for her) I tried to figure out my interactions with Sideswipe. I somehow went from him being annoying as pit to cuddling? with him feeling... right. But how, I didn't even see this as a possibility before and now... . Well I guess the question is whether this is a crush or is there another reason? I'm sure Ratchet has an answer but why does my life have to be so complicated?

My thoughts were interrupted by mom prodding at me thru the bond. "Yes?" I asked

"Finally what the frag were you day dreaming about, I need you to turn around your to fragging big for me to move."

... Gee thanks, I think I can still rule out tact as part of her vocabulary. I however suddenly felt very playful and slightly mischievous, may as well go with it. So doing what she asked I turned... 360 degrees. She vented but I could feel her amusement and relief.

"Glad to see you're feeling better" She said dryly "but one turn _180_ degrees and two what brought this on?"

"I realized that if I don't try he wins, that he'll have accomplished his goal. He didn't the first time he sure as pit won't this time." I said starting to turn only to stop when our bond suddenly felt as if it had decided to detour thru the Arctic Ocean... in the middle of winter.

"The first time?" Mom asked her voice doing the same. Well slag there went that secret. Before I could move she was right in front of me and I was staring into her plasma like optics. With a sigh I explained what had happened before, after I finished I couldn't tell who she wanted to slag more me for not telling her before or Barricade.

What I hated though was my first instinct was to shrink into myself for the beating my processor was sure would come. That reaction alone told me that this time I wasn't getting out of it unscathed. We were interrupted by the voice of a femme I hadn't heard in over a month.

"Mom?" Sapphire called out.

I was immediately filled with guilt, I didn't even ask about her once since I onlined. Before I could continue with that thought mom interrupted it. "Shadowfire you've only barely been washed and considering what's happened you haven't had a chance to." She said very firmly.

I didn't bother responding. I learned long ago not to bother unless its life or death, she's just too stubborn.

'Phire entered the wash racks then, she saw me and her optics lit up. Before I could respond she was across the room with her arms around me, she gave a happy trill as she pressed herself as tightly against me as she could. I just held her close. I was happy to see her, but still unable to help the feeling guilt clawing at my spark.

I did realize something then. That I needed to be strong for Sapphire. Though she can (mostly) take care of herself, she still looks up to and learns from me. She always will, just like I do with Chromia. So I need try, I know it'll be hard and it won't be instantaneous but if I don't try I never will be. While I'm at it maybe I can figure out where exactly I and Sideswipe stand.

It's been two days since I onlined and 'Phire hasn't let me out of her sight. It's kind of cute that she's taken it upon herself to take care of me, though there is only so much I can take. Also I'm pretty sure it's become an unspoken rule not to touch me, at least without announcing yourself first. That was probably decided after Mudflap lost an arm. I'm not sure who was more surprised, me that I cut it off or him that he lost it.

Right so I might be just a biiit jumpy, but I can't help it. It's like I've fallen back into my more... instinctive reactions, for example attacking when I'm surprised or scared. Unfortunately both of those are very easy to do at the moment. I knew this would be hard but I most definitely didn't think it would be this bad. Obviously I am not allowed to train at the moment, so my life is the definition of boring.

I'm currently watching Sapphire train with my mom and her sisters, partially because I'm bored but also because I want to see how far she's come along. The weapons look like they're modified versions of the humans, namely larger. If I remember correctly they're practicing team work today, 'Phire and Flare-up are together against mom and Arcee.

Arcee still won't talk to me at all (not surprising given my known past) and Flare-up… seems undecided, meaning she doesn't out right hate me but hasn't made any effort to be my friend either. Humph and mom wonders why I'm not eager to re-open those bonds. It's bad enough knowing most of my family hate's me I don't need to actually feel it to, if they even kept them open.

"Mom?"

My helm snapped up at Sapphire's voice as she was a lot closer than I expected. I felt a small wave of sadness flow over or bond before she continued.

"Sorry, 'Mia said we're done for today so can we go to the wash racks now?" She asked a bit more quietly than usual. I had to repress a sigh once again being treated like glass just because I was surprised.

"Already?" I said checking my chronometer and finding I had once again spent most of the day thinking. "Oh, yeah come on."

Sapphire spent the walk giving me looks like she wanted to ask me something. I didn't say anything knowing she would ask when she was ready to. She plucked up the courage as we entered the wash racks.

"So what were you thinking about?" She asked trying to appear nonchalant, like she only asked out of curiosity. I may as well have a bit of fun then.

"When? This morning, yesterday, a year ago? You'll have to be more specific than that." I said

I had to hold back a grin when she released a sharp vent, apparently she didn't find that as amusing as I did.

"Today when I was training with 'Mia."

Right my turn to be vague.

"The past, future possibility's, stuff like that." I haven't told her about my family because I know she would take it upon herself and _try _to fix it. Unfortunately two or three of the included bots may not want it fixed. Going by the look she just gave me she felt the pang that shot thru my spark at that thought, but chose not to comment.

It did however lead to an awkward silence for the rest of our time in the wash racks. We decided (well I decided and Sapphire followed me) to head to the firing range. I wanted to practice with my rifle as I hadn't done so since before I was captured.

"Didn't Ratchet say no training?" Sapphire asked as we walked through the entrance.

"But I'm not training, I'm just reliving stress and having fun. If I happen to hone my skills at the same time that's just a bonus." I said forming my rifle while the targets were set up. _Not quite as good as the ones on Cybertron but it'll do. _I thought as I line up a shot on the first target.

An hour later it was apparent that my skills had dropped off a bit while I was… away. Which is to say great for the average bot but ok for a sniper. It didn't help that I kept giving out pointers and corrections to Sapphire when she decided to join in about half way thru. She's defiantly improved thanks to Chromia, but I think she likes practicing with me more. If only because every time I praise or compliment her I can feel bursts of joy over our bond.

Of course it might also be the fact that I have a more… sedate approach than my mother, though I'm not sure that's the right word for it. It would be more like comparing cutting down a tree with a saw or a plasma cannon.

"Are you done or do you wants to stay longer?" I asked rolling my shoulder, that's probably the closest I'll come to saying it hurt.

"I- yea but can we come back tomorrow?" She asked

I think she must have noticed my shoulder because I'm pretty sure she was going to ask to stay. I'm not sure if I like that she's already that observant. However before we got five feet from the entrance I was commed by Ratchet.

.: If you're not in my medbay in five minutes I'm finding you and dragging you back.:.

I didn't even get to respond before he ended it. I caste a glance at Sapphire to see that she was avoiding my gaze, if I had any doubts of how he knew they're gone now. I vented before heading toward the medbay knowing without a shadow of a doubt my day was only going to get worse.


	9. Chapter 9

A/N: Ok, sorry it took so long but here it is chapter 9. So part of the reason it took so long is because I had to go back through the other chapters and change something's, nothing really major but enough to make my new plot idea work, so those are now re-uploaded as well.

Disclaimer: I own only my OC Shadowfire and changes to existing plot.

Breem- 8.3 minutes

Nano-klick- One second

Klick- 1.2 minutes

Joor- 6.5 hours

Solar cycle- One day

Cycle- 1.25 hours

Vorn- 83 years

.:abcd:.- Comm' link

{abcd}- Bond

"_abcd_"- Cybertronian

_abcd_- Thought's

Chapter 9

I walked into the medbay half expecting a wrench to be flying in my direction; I was pleasantly surprised when there wasn't.

Until I saw Ratchets face.

"I specifically told you no training for this reason femme." He growled out as I walked toward the nearest berth.

"And I didn't-"

"Then what were you doing?" He asked cutting me off.

"Stress relief?" I know there's not a hope in the pit that I'll get off that easy. To be honest I'm surprised Ratchet's glare hadn't melted me by that point.

"And when your joint began causing pain did you think that maybe you should stop?" He asked in a tone that told me he knew the answer. In light of this I decided not to say anything, that and when I opened my mouth I could see him fingering one of his wrench's.

He started speaking again after a quick scan.

"You're lucky you stopped when you did or you wouldn't be flying for a few day's at least." He said before starting his work, ignoring my look of complete shock. _How does shooting affect my being able to fly? _I cocked my helm to the side a questioning expression on my face.

"Ratchet-"

"In its weakened state you could have damaged it enough to impede your transformations; contrary to what you all think I have reasons for the limitations I place." He said using more force than necessary on my shoulder.

_That would have been great to know before._ I sat there wincing occasionally as he finished, after he was done I slinked out of the medbay cowed by the thought of not being able to fly even for a few days. It is one thing to choose not to do something but it is another thing entirely to have no choice about it.

Nightmares are new for me, let's face it when your creators are as obsessed (not to mention _extremely _well trained) with weapons as mine are you don't really have the same fears as other younglings. So if you haven't figured it out yet, I have no idea how to deal with them. The fact that I was having them now shows just how much this whole experience has fragged up my processor.

So now there I was on a small little hill overlooking the ocean hoping to escape them. Normally I fall back on sparing but that's obviously not an option at the moment.

"Can't recharge?"

I practically flew to my feet forming a dagger as I turned, only to see a semi-amused Sideswipe standing behind me with his arms crossed.

"So that's a yes?" He asked still grinning.

For whatever reason he ignores my few skittish moments, unlike everyone else who either apologizes, tiptoes around me for a day afterward or both. I'm still not sure if I appreciate or hate it.

"What do you want?" I asked trying to will my now racing spark to slow down.

"Why do you assume I want something?" He asked

I just glared at him not bothering with an answer as I was in no mood for playful banter, and my already dark mood was only getting worse the more he tried. I could have sworn I heard him murmur something that sounded suspiciously like "Femmes" before he answered.

"I was just on patrol and saw you walking over here, and considering everyone else is recharging or at least trying to I came to see what was wrong."

I looked at him suspiciously but he actually sounded… serious, something I've never expected from him. My glare softened a little before I turned away with a sigh. I don't really want to explain that I'm having nightmares for the first time in my life, not that I'd know how if I did. I guess I can blame that on being with the 'Cons for so long.

Part of me still see's asking for help as a weakness, no matter that I actually need it or that among the Autobots it's practically expected. I don't know how long I sat there arguing with myself before I finally answered.

"Sideswipe I don't think it's anything you can help with." I said glancing at him from the corner of my optics to see his reaction.

To his credit he didn't look too surprised by my answer but instead of walking away like I expected he stood there expectantly.

"Why are you still here?" I asked now actually turning my helm so I could see him better.

I saw a corner of his lips twitch up before he answered.

"I'm not going anywhere until you at least tell me what's bothering you."

My mouth almost dropped open from shock. _Why is he so fragging insistent on me telling him?_ I scoured my processor trying to find a reason what his motives could possibly be, but came up with nothing.

Fine then.

"Nightmares." I said with a sigh.

He looked at me obviously expecting more details, Primus what does he want a fragging play by play? He sure as pit knows what they're about so why do I have to tell him, I'm already having enough trouble keeping my memories at bay without him interfering. At that I came to a conclusion, it was his fault I was there anyway.

"Your fault, it was all your fault. If you could have just been serious for one fragging mission none of this would have happened! I wouldn't have been tortured or-" I turned away hiding the tears in my optics.

I don't know how long I stood there warring with my emotions, it was only when he took a step back that I realized I had drawn my sword. I looked back at him and it was obvious from his shocked look this was not the reaction he expected, well to fragging bad. However as much as I wanted to offline him I knew if I did I wouldn't be welcome here any longer, then where would I be, but alone and hunted by both sides.

"_Please_ just leave me alone." I said my voice wavering. After he left I stood there torn between screaming out my frustrations or breaking down into tears. As I tried to sheath my sword I realized my servos were shaking.

_Frag it, I need some high grade._ I stood up taking a second to cycle some air, hoping to cool my systems a bit. I picked up my blade and sheathed it before starting toward the 'bot rec room/lounge. It's basically just a room with a television, bot sized couches, and a supply of mid and high grade energon.

I was glad to find that it was empty when I arrived, but honestly it was the middle of the fragging night who else would be there? So I crossed the room to the. . . well to be honest I'm not really sure what to call it but the best description would be two counters, one for bots around mom's size and the second for the taller bots.

Any way I grabbed 4 cubes which is usually just enough to give me a sort of warm fuzzy feeling. However I forgot to take into account that my tanks practically empty so somewhere around half way through the third cube I wasn't quite over energized but was a bit passed what humans would call "tipsy". It wasn't until I onlined in the morning that I realized I was still in the rec room.

I groaned when I realized that at some point I had finished another 3 cubes as well, but I guess that explains the processor ache. I stood up and placed them with the other used cubes before downing a mid-grade cube and adding it to the stack.

Of course that for whatever reason caused the whole stack to tilt. My intakes stop for a second while I waited for it to fall and I carefully walked backward toward to door; of course as soon as I turned to leave though the whole thing came crashing down. I vented slowly trying not to take my frustration out on the wall.

Five minutes and several attempts later I just left that cube off of the stack. Yup I can already tell this'll be a great day. When I left the room I headed toward the wash racks, figuring I should at least try to get some of the dirt off my frame. I had made half-way there before I noticed Sideswipe following me. I don't know how long he has been but I should have noticed before sooner either way I have no desire to talk to the fragger, pit just looking at him makes my energon boil.

So not wanting to get into a fight at the moment I transformed down into my lambo alt and took off in the general direction of the wash racks. When I was satisfied that he wasn't following me anymore I slowed down to the "legal" base speed limit, after all I don't want to know what punishment Prime would think up for speeding if I don't have to.

Before I knew it I reached my destination, however before I could even start my transformation sequence I received a comm from Prime.

.: Shadow if you have a moment I would like to speak with you.:. He said

.: Now?:. I asked praying to Primus he said no.

.: If possible.:.

Well slag there went my plan.

I sighed .: On my way, Shadow out.:.

I signed off before I realized that I didn't ask where he was. If I could have I would have face-palmed (something that I've picked up from the humans). Now I just had to decide whether to comm him back or just take a guess of where he is. Of course I'm stubborn so I guessed.

Luckily when I walked into his office he was sitting behind his desk reading a data pad.

"Prime." I said coming to a stop in front of him.

He set down the data pad as he looked up at me and steepling his fingers in-front of his chest. "Shadow I just wanted to see how you were recovering."

I stared at him shuttering and unshuttering my optics. "How am I? Gee let's see almost everyone hates me, I can't shoot or train and I'm apparently having night-" I stopped there shuttering my optics. I wasn't planning on telling anyone else that. I glanced up at Optimus to see him looking at me concerned.

"Sorry it just been… stressful lately."

Optimus nodded "That's understandable but if you need anything do not hesitate to ask."

I nodded "Is that all?" I asked _I doubt that he would call me here just for that._

"Actually no, Ratchet has informed me of your situation." He said looking straight into my optics. I froze why would Ratchet tell him _now_ of all times?

"So in light of this as you cannot train I found a job that is within your currently limited ability's. It has come to my attention that Mikaela Banes is in need a guardian and as you are already acquainted with her I believe you are perfect for the job." I blinked in surprise at this.

Ok on one servo I was relieved that Ratchet hadn't told him and on the other I was surprised he trusted me enough for this.

"Prime I… do you really trust me that much?"

"I do and I will continue to do so until proven otherwise, though I would prefer such an event never take place."

In other words don't frag up_._

I stood there processing, going over my options before I answered.

"Prime… thank you, I would be honored to receive this assignment."

Optimus smiled at me "Good, you are free to leave tomorrow at your convenience." I nodded before walking out of his office. It was only when I reached the wash racks that I realized a very important fact. In order to take the assignment I would need to leave Sapphire behind.

"Oh Pit." I groaned sliding down the slick wall. How could I have forgotten her? I know she won't be happy but it's better in the long run right? She can't enjoy the current environment, all the hostility between the other bots and I. That and I need this I can't sit around on my aft all day, it's just not in my nature.

But she'll understand that?

Right?

I walked out of the wash racks lost in thought and managed to almost walk over Mom.

"Shadow watch it!" I started at her exclamation but said nothing. She stepped back and looked at me closely for a minute before speaking.

"Shadow is something bothering you?" She asked concerned.

"N- yes" I said seeing her glare and she gave me a look that clearly said to continue. "Well Optimus offered me an assignment and I accepted but it was only afterward that I remembered I have Sapphire" It was around here I lost track of my own thoughts.

"Shadow I think-."

"and I know I shouldn't have forgotten-"

"Shadow?"

"but I've never exactly had a youngling to care for before"

"Shadow!"

"and now I have no idea what I should or shouldn't do-"

"Shadow_fire_!"

I looked at her surprised.

"Sit."

I stared at her confused.

"Well come on your too fragging tall for me to talk to like this so _sit_."

I snorted at that but sat none the less. She leaned on the wall next to me giving me a hard look which made me feel like I was a youngling again.

"Shadowfire I realize this is new for you but you have to calm down, you can't do anything if you glitch." I vented and started to open my mouth only to close it when her optics narrowed even more.

"Now tell me why you accepted."

I vented "What does-"

"Mute it, now answer the question. Why did you accept?" I thought for a second.

"I need it."

"Why?"

I took a moment to process that before answering.

"I need to get away from here. Everyone switches between pitying and hating me, and because of my injuries I can't take any other missions."

"So why take this one?"

"Because I still want to help, but I don't see what-"

"Mute it." Mom growled "Now what good will you do 'Phire if you drive yourself insane here? None, so go tell her and spend the rest of the day with her but you _will_ take the assignment _and_ heal or I swear to Primus I won't let you near her."

"What?!" My jaw dropped

"I didn't stutter and it's for your own good. I know this is wearing you out, 'Hide and I raised you and 'Bee in relative peace, but between the missions you were sent on and her own training I don't think you've gotten a single day alone with Sapphire."

I opened my mouth only to realize she was right. Both of us were training and while I've been recovering she still had training. Not that we have a choice because of the fighting, not to mention that we're stranded on this planet with nowhere to go. So we're always busy her for defense and me from habit as well as keeping up my skills.

"And what do you suggest I do?"

Mom thought for a minute. "You haven't been cleared for field missions yet right?" She asked. I nodded slowly as I was unsure what she was getting at.

"Then as your both going to be here during the next one," I went to correct her but was once again silenced with a look. "As I was saying you can spend the time with Sapphire _then_ leave. Speaking of which what are you doing?" I slowly vented as I had been hoping I wouldn't have to tell her.

"Guardian for Banes."

I could tell she didn't know who I was talking about.

Well maybe this won't be as bad as I thought.

"Sam's girlfriend? What Bee does talk to me." she said seeing my shocked expression. Of course he does now she's going to ask-

"So are you going to tell him?" She asked.

Yup there it is.

"What just out of nowhere like "Hi remember that sister you thought was dead yeah I'm her."

"Yes."

I shuttered my optics with a quick vent. "Mom not everyone appreciates your bluntness in all areas, some things you can't-shouldn't just spit out."

"You will have to tell him one way or another." She said

"Or what?"

"He will figure it out for himself, he is a scout they're trained to be observant and the amount of time you will be spending together will be significant-"

"I'm good at hiding my feelings."

"And if he finds out from another bot he _will_ hate you, or at the least resent you for not trusting him and that goes for your father as well. Besides I have all of them after me asking why I'm so friendly with you, the ex 'Con when any other I'd just slag." I glared at her.

"Thanks mom because that makes it so much easier." I stood up and started pacing.

"Fraaagg." I groaned "What if they hate me anyway? Regardless of my state I did horrible things as a 'Con, so why wouldn't they hate me?"

Mom grabbed my servo forcing me to look her in the optics before she spoke.

"Shadowfire 'Bee adores you even now when he thinks your offline after all this time. All the time he wishes you were still here, 'Hide and the others are no different. Yes your father may need some time but your brother will forgive you just like he always has."

After mom finished speaking she held my stare for a second before letting go of my servo and walking into the wash racks.

"Mom wait."

She stopped in the entrance and turned back toward me.

"Thanks." I said softly sending love and gratitude through our bond.

{You are welcome Sweetspark.} She replied before walking through the door. I started to walk away before I heard her shout.

"And don't forget about tomorrow!"

I rolled my optics before walking off already making plans for the next day.

"So what exactly do you do for fun?"

Sapphire blinked, her brow plates scrunching up as she looked at me confused.

"Umm… train?" She said a few seconds later.

I vented _Primus she worse than her grandfather… not that I'm much better._

"Besides training."

"Isn't Uncle Bee supposed to be here today?"

I managed to keep from glitching when she called my brother her uncle.

"What did you call him?" I asked

Sapphire looked at me her helm tilted sideways. "Uncle Bee, he told me to call him that last time he visited, and he seemed really happy when I did."

I'm glad she wasn't looking at me or she would have noticed my optics dim, and I can't exactly tell her it's because he thought he never would be.

"Well maybe you can get ideas from him, I'm sure he'll have some." As I said that I noticed Sapphire giving me a funny look from the corner of her optic. Right I forgot as far as she's concerned I've only met him once, though that's only because I made sure to avoid him whenever he came, not really a choice now.

"Mom is everything ok?"

"Yes, why do you ask?"

"Well you're acting really weird."

I vented "Everything is fine sweetspark."

She kept staring at me with her brilliant sapphire optics like she was looking directly into my spark.

"Mom-"

"Sapphire drop it, I'm fine."

I felt guilty when I saw the hurt in her optics, but before I had the chance to apologize I heard, then saw a C-130 fly overhead. Sapphire was off and almost transformed before she stopped looking guilty. I sighed, transforming down as well.

"Well let's go greet _Uncle_ 'Bee." I said trying to set aside my apprehension.

I really wish I'd taken acting classes.

* * *

**A/N**: BTW any activity ideas you my have for Shadowfire and Co. will help finish the next chapter much faster, beacuse to be honest I suck at coming up with them.


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